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What is the most transformative conversation you have ever had on the subject of fashion or style?

I’m truly stumped right now.

Not only can I not think of an actual conversation right away but the first thing that popped into my mind was:

If by conversation you mean “reading or writing a blog” and if it can include talking to yourself while you mumble in your closet creating outfits or in a change room as you see items hang differently on your frame than you expected, then I’d have to say I have had plenty little milestones to get to where I am today.

[Cue 3 actual days of racking my brain]

OK I got it.

One conversation stands out to me today now that I think about it.

I had went to high school in a bright fluorescent eyeball searing orange zipped jacket with navy and white stripes on the arms, probably snagged on the liquidation rack as no one wanted it, I’m sure. I think we still have it at home as my parents are Hoarders.

A boy whom all the popular kids thought was so ugly who turned out to be a quirkily handsome, sweet and all around genuinely nice guy in high school (think Neville Longbottom actor Matthew Lewis from Harry Potter), turned to me and said:

” You know, I don’t think anyone would ever be so daring to wear such a colour at school.”

At the time I think I took it as a compliment but the insecure high school nerd inside of me (who was never ever popular in her life) wonders a tiny bit if he meant it as such.

That conversation made me go to the bathroom to discover how strangely hued my olive complexion was against that eye balls jarring orange and how dull and strange I looked in comparison to the jacket.

It made my skin and complexion look ghoulish actually.

The jacket was wearing me!!

To this day I remember thinking:

“It isn’t what I wear, it is how I wear it and own it, but I need to also pick more flattering colours for my skin….or try a print with the colours I want to wear instead.”

That sort of awakened my fashion consciousness so I’m happy he said it.

I also think he meant it in a friendly, approving of my fashion risk taking way, rather than a backhanded passive-aggressive faux compliment.

So over the years through tried and  true mumbling and seeing myself in a mirror (my best style friend alongside a camera), I have learned to:

  • Dress for my body type or else I do look disproportionate and it makes me uncomfortable the whole day if I happen to catch how terrible the look is
  • Avoid colours that make me feel sad and look bad; think muddy pastels or dull shades of jewel tones
  • Avoid anything that highlights my shoulders (puff shoulders, cap tops, shoulder pads) or is a cropped top to make me look even more broad shouldered and therefore uncomfortable


The entire series can be found here: Women in Clothes Style & Fashion Survey


  • NZ Muse

    At the random church rummage sale with Mum looking at the clothing racks. There was one magenta top on the rack that the lady pointed out to us. I basically said I don’t think I could pull that off! She disagreed. I tried it on. It looked awesome.

    That was my kind of awakening to colours I suppose, and led me to look more into colour theory and figure out what suited me. Now I would say shopping only for colours that suits me, underpins most of my approach to style. Because man, there are so many that wash me out.

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