??:?? — Waking up tired. Today is the day we normally head out to play for the morning but I am so incredibly tired, I am going to stay in and let them go out alone.
7:59 a.m. — He snuggles into my side and sweetly says: You know Mommy, I know the code to get into your closet*, and you haven’t given me your TELEPHONE code yet, but that’s okay…. *side eye*
Me: Why would you even need my telephone code? What could you possibly need to do instead my phone?
Little Bun: Oh you know. Just in case.
(I am definitely NOT giving him my phone code.)
*Note: He knows the closet door code because I told him, as he burst into tears that he would be locked out and left out of knowing, but I warned him to NEVER use the code even if he knew it, to go into my closet without permission. He nodded through his tears and to this day, has never ever done it. Even when I give him permission to enter the code when we are about to go in to play or do Upcycling, he looks at me and refuses. He wants me to do it instead because I told him one rule and it is the one he will follow. He’s a pretty strict rule follower…. which is both good and bad.
8:00 a.m. — First meeting of the day.
12:28 p.m. — Little Bun eats his vegetable stew; every night he has a big bowl of this stuff, full of vegetables which vary by week to week. It’s a mix of any of the following: Carrots, turnips, sweet potato, butternut squash, garlic, onions, lentils or beans…. and because we have basil, we prune a few branches and leaves, and I rip them up into his meal to add another flavour profile (he attacks the stew when basil is in there).
4:10 p.m. — After his nap, he insists that we do something together. I haven’t had much energy lately, but we end up playing “Mommy Ninja” where I run in from the bedroom in an surprise attack to snuggle him and he has to hit the pillow alarm before I reach him. I am fast, and he is not, so when we play “Little Bun Ninja”, he usually loses unless I pretend to have a slower reaction time.
7:16 p.m. — 3 loads of laundry DONE. I leave it for tomorrow to fold and finish. I am lying down, taking a break reading the rest of my book while he reads beside me.
8:47 p.m. — Then it is bedtime.
??:?? — I wake up exhausted. It is definitely 6 a.m. We slept late last night. He kept asking me so many questions that I didn’t fall asleep until later.
6:00 a.m. — I make a tea and log in.
8:23 a.m. — FUN! I hop on the phone with my friend after checking I have no morning calls.
9:15 a.m. — I quickly get off my call telling my friend that Little Bun “is having a crisis and I need to go”, after my call, he bursts into fresh tears and wails: I HATE IT WHEN YOU TELL HER WHEN I AM DOING BAD THINGS! I DON’T WANT HER TO KNOW!!!!…. I quickly reassure him that “crisis” means an emergency not a bad thing, and I did not tell her what he was being bad (?) about.
Turns out, he hates it when I am laughing with my friend and tells me: I hate it when you laugh with ANYONE ELSE BUT ME... whoa… and I ask him why because it was disturbingly controlling, and he told me: It’s because I don’t know the joke and I want to laugh too!
I tell him what we were laughing about (adult personality stuff), he looks at me and says: But I don’t get the joke.
So I spend the next 10 minutes explaining why it was funny to adults, and he still doesn’t really get it, but is understanding that what we find funny is not actually a joke at all in the traditional sense and he may not even find it funny.
I also explain that I get to laugh any time I want, and he can’t tell me what to do, BUT I promised that after the calls, I’d explain to him why I was laughing and so he could get the joke later and laugh along as well (sometimes he gets mad when I laugh on my work calls with colleagues, but we laugh about stupid things like making a mistake in deleting a document).
God, parenting is difficult.
12:08 p.m. — Lunch time, I am making it while on a call. This wireless headset is very handy, I just wish it had some sort of blinky or physical indicator on it to say it is on mute because I do on occasion, forget that I did or did not put myself on mute with the headset, so I usually do it on the screen in the Zoom call instead JUST TO BE SURE.
1:10 p.m. — I take a short reading break and have a tea. This work from home business makes you work constantly and not have breaks because no one distracts you. This is both good and bad.
4:16 p.m. — Logged off for the day, I read with Little Bun, then we do more laundry and he starts folding 3 sets. Cheeky baby has the nerve to ask me:
Little Bun: Mommy, what do I get for doing all three laundry baskets? (Daddy’s clothes, his clothes, kitchen towels)
Me: The satisfaction of a job well done. *side eye*
Little Bun: Oh. *keeps folding*
He knows better than to whine or argue about this because he know it is his job to do these things, because I will lecture him AGAIN. This is a point I will not budge on. He doesn’t get rewards or gifts for doing… HIS JOB. I really dislike this culture / attitude taught to children, particularly little boys, and I am actively working against it.
When he gets older and if he asks me this again, I will tell him:
You get to keep living here. *side eye*
…but I think he is too young for this level of sarcasm, and might think I am genuinely being mean to him, so I hold my sarcasm.
5:00 p.m. — All laundry done, dinner time!
6:20 p.m. — I sort out my rings and things with him on the bed. This is a fun activity for us.
8:47 p.m. — Bedtime. Usual stuff happens at night – dishes, wiping cutlery, cleaning things, vacuuming.
??:?? — OK I need to take a nap to reset my body. I AM SO TIRED.
7:00 a.m. — I head back to bed after my partner is up.
7:59 a.m. — I reveal myself again after lying down for an hour and log into a call.
9:10 a.m. — Little Bun’s mistake chart is going well! Every time (I mean EVERY TIME) he makes a mistake, we log it here and he is so excited to get a star (to show that he is learning). Once he reaches 100, he gets a Mistake Star Trophy.
Each time I tell him I am sad I am not getting enough mistake hearts on MY chart, he pats my arm and says: That’s okay Mommy! You’re older, so maybe you don’t make as much mistakes as I do because I am still learning, and you made them all when you were a baby.
He tallies up the stars using a method we learned in one of his math books with 4 dots, then lines, each complete set representing 10.
12:08 p.m. — Lunch time, I am dragging. I should nap. But it’s a smidge too warm / humid to comfortably nap even in the second bedroom or living room (I would prefer the bedroom). I am in a predicament.
3:22 p.m. — Little Bun is up from HIS nap, in the cool dark bedroom and demands to know what we are doing. I foist him off on his father to come up with some arts and crafts activities and he starts drawing and cutting out the flag of Canada, France, things he likes to eat, animals, flowers, and my partner pastes them all onto a piece of paper to keep as his childhood artwork. He is very good at filing and making folios of Little Bun’s paper “books” and works and labels them after each year has passed.
5:30 p.m. — Log into a late call that I thought was 5 minutes but turned into 40 minutes. I am aggravated because we already had this exact same meeting last week, but it’s like he’s a goldfish and has completely forgotten everything.
6:49 p.m. — Little Bun has dinner, I clean up and do dishes and leave the cutlery for him to wipe. I kept having to tell him there was cutlery to wipe and finally I gave up on that emotional labour and said: Baby, when you see Mommy has done dishes, please also check the counter to see if any cutlery has to be wiped that is left there because it is YOUR JOB TO DO SO. He nods, but it will take some time to sink in, so I will repeat myself on the daily I suppose.
7:50 p.m. — He bangs on the piano of his own volition, practicing his right and left hands on his own, and going through the songs.
8:49 p.m. — Time for bed. I was reading a good chunk of the night. He is doing some stuff with his father, as long as they’re both quiet and not screaming I am relaxed.
??:?? — Okay I promise today I will nap.
6:00 a.m. — I log in and start replying to emails.
7:59 a.m. — Meetings start.
12:08 p.m. — During lunch, I check his workbook answers. Some of them were wrong, and he got Mistake Stars, but I scold him for being lazy because I saw that he got the answer wrong, he “fixed it”, and then it was wrong again because he didn’t take the time to properly write out the equation.
He looks at me about to cry because he thinks I am angry but I am not angry, I tell him I am disappointed and a little frustrated at his laziness to avoid even writing out the equation and doing the work when he knew he made a mistake. I told him that because of that, it took twice as long and he had to do the equation on the paper ANYWAY, so he saved zero time in being lazy.
I tell him I am not angry at him. I am disappointed he took the lazy way out and didn’t try to do it correctly.
1:15 p.m. — Time for his nap, and I have calls.
3:30 p.m. — After his nap, he runs off to play on his own doing something in the bedroom (?) or reads while I am on calls.
5:02 p.m. — Done for the day.
5:28 p.m. — He runs up to me with a sock and says: MOMMY! This has a hole in it. May I please learn how to sew it up? .… I tell him yes, but to check ALL the other socks for holes. He runs back saying there are none, I tell him to make sure he checked the basket of clothes. He finds another one, and we have two to repair.
I teach him how to cut the thread neatly (we still have issues), put the loose end back into the catcher on the spool so it doesn’t tangle or unravel, thread the needle nicely, halve up the ends and then make triple knots to make it hold (I explain each step of why we do what we do and why we need a knot):
…and then how to make neat, even, tight stitches, not loose sloppy ones, and how to cut and then knot up the ends.
He is now searching for other things to mend. I think we have some handkerchiefs he could practice on. This is an excellent life skill to learn how to sew up gaps, sew on buttons (we have yet to find a button to fix though I could give him some practice cloth + buttons), and just basic sewing skills.
I get this message:
Normally I’d do the mending, but I really hate bringing out the sewing basket and doing it each time for just one sock, so I wait until there’s a big pile and then I do all the mending at once while watching videos. Little Bun however, dislikes unfinished tasks and pokes me to do it every day. Now I am just teaching him how to do it himself under my supervision.
I like mending and sewing things up because like I said – we buy quality. These are good organic cotton socks and it is just a little rip. Until they get serious holes in them, by which time they will turn into dusting rags (you stick your hand in, and just use it to wipe cabinets), or polishing rags (same deal, you just dip into a big tub of polish and clean your boots), they should be cared for until his feet get too big to wear them.
6:42 p.m. — We have another delicious dinner with our harvested basil (we are eating the smaller basil plants that did not grow as well, and calling it “organic microgreens”, which I am sure they charge $50 for a small plate of in restaurants). I split the haul with Little Bun (my partner dislikes most herbs).
8:45 p.m. — Dishes done, he checked for cutlery, time for reading, and then bedtime. We do a few games of Mommy and Little Bun Ninja, and his new ‘rules’ are becoming ever more elaborate.
??:?? — I wake up and PROMISE THIS TIME I WILL NAP TODAY. Hah!
6:00 a.m. — Ah shoot. A seller sent the wrong dress (it was secondhand), and mixed up the packages. Now I have to return it and hope the other one I REALLY WANTED comes back so I can re-buy it again. -$109.11
6:19 a.m. — I log in and work.
8:10 a.m. — What the? I didn’t get paid. I shoot off an email and it’s resolved by the end of the day. I think someone in accounting forgot to confirm the transfer, but for me, when I get paid monthly it means I am relying on them to be punctual…. although I guess it doesn’t matter as I don’t need it to pay my next month’s bills, but still. I dislike not being paid on time.
12:30 p.m. — After lunch we read in the bedroom and he creates a Prime Numbers chart with his father.
12:28 p.m. — Now he wants to make a garbage can. I find a cylinder cutout page and he colours it in and I help him fix it up.
1:50 p.m. — I go down for my nap. I really need it.
3:00 p.m. — Little Bun wakes me up with his banging on the bedroom door, which is my cue to go back to work. The only drawback to this Little Bun alarm system is sometimes he naps and I oversleep, and then I COULD miss meetings. It hasn’t happened yet because I have a nervous instinct of when I should be awake / ready for a meeting if I do nap, so I find it hard to just sleep deeply. It’s just a catnap to refresh my brain.
4:50 p.m. — Why am I in this meeting? I feel like it’s useless.
5:43 p.m. — Finally done my tube of cleanser! I cut the tubes down and keep silicone covers (reusable and great. for kitchen bowls and plates) on top of it to keep it moist so it doesn’t dry out:
8:50 p.m. — Time for bed.
7:29 a.m. — I wake up refreshed. HE SLEPT IN!!!!!! OH MY. <3
8:19 a.m. — My friend recommended a bunch of shows, but his taste is not mine. He said Gomorrah, Casa de Papel, How to sell drugs online, and Luther were good. I watched half an episode, struggled to finish the first one of each, and gave up. It’s not my thing. The only show I have liked so far recommended by most people was Lupin. I initially resisted because it didn’t sound interesting, but had they told me: This is a Sherlockian-Oceans 11 series with a Parisian twist, I WOULD HAVE BEEN ON BOARD FROM THE START. But no, they did not say this, and I did not get to watch it until now. I watched it twice in English and in French, and I prefer the French verison.
11:08 a.m. — I make hemp milk on the advice of a friend, and since it takes up LESS water than cow’s milk or almond milk, I try it (though it takes more water than soy, oat and pea). I make it and try it. Little Bun is eager to try it but then after a third gulp, says he does not enjoy it.
It has a broccoli-esque aftertaste, and when I try it in my tea, it is too broccoli for me. It overpowers the tea. I want to try it with matcha green tea tomorrow to see if I can cut HALF of my reusable glass milk consumption, or more if this works out.
I think commercial mylks work well because they add salt, sugar, thickeners and all sorts of extra additives that I am not a fan of. Plus they do not come in glass bottles so it is more plastic and cartons. With my milk it’s all glass at least, so I am not contributing to the landfills in that regard.
5:56 p.m. — Little Bun cuts out flowers for me and wants me to take a picture against my case, as he thinks it looks nice. It is quite striking!
??:?? — I wake up slightly refreshed.
3:15 p.m. — I love the look of these interiors.
This open picture window door looks great but isn’t really interesting for winters as the snow and ice would cause problems. Also. BUGS.
I like the half raised living room sort of concept here, but I would stub my toe I am sure. I do like the idea of it for my closet office however.
The room is so great! The books, and the wonderful pictures in a row, neatly framed and interesting.
7:11 p.m. — After dinner, Little Bun and I read, and then do laundry.
8:56 p.m. — Time for bed.
Want more? Read all of my previous Week of Money Diaries.