7:00 a.m. — He slept in AGAIN! OMG.
7:20 a.m. — I make tea, and work on other mini projects, check my bank accounts…
7:59 a.m. — I manage to get some work done – I set up an Etsy shop for two test products to see how it goes. I am hoping to get more net income in from the sale of these items so that my next cheque for this month’s charity (it was Sick Kids Foundation) is a 4-figure one. It’s so incredibly soul-satisfying to write out such a big cheque (for me), to charities every month, and this drives me!
8:29 a.m. — I play with Little Bun, reading books and snuggling.
9:15 a.m. — He insists on classic books and we read a few together. Then we build a metro station again with interchange stations, and matching it to the map he created.
11:33 a.m. — LUNCH! I eat a big bowl of quinoa, mashed potatoes, chicken and beets.
12:28 p.m. — OMG! I HIT 10,000 FOLLOWERS ON INSTAGRAM! This is epic for me. I can finally add swipe up on Story posts and have people EASILY go to external links. *cries tears of happy joy*
I set up a Story Post as an Introduction, here’s what I wrote in case you are interested:
3:40 p.m. — He actually slept for a nap even though he slept in this morning too. I am happy. It’s not like he has school or we are going anywhere. Might as well let him sleep.
4:34 p.m. — I am obsessed with this pasta with plain olive oil, some salt, and that’s it. I just love the taste of it.
5:11 p.m. — I feel totally pumped after my last week of being sick and sleeping for 3-4 days straight. With this new energy, I decide to start on a new set of Level Up Business books.
6:40 p.m. — We vacuum the entire apartment and he keeps squealing: We are coming for you dust bunnies! WATCH OUT! … Mommy we are catching ALL the baby dust bunnies before the aunts and uncles come home with food!
7:19 p.m. — We play “The Knight and the Crocodile”, a game I made up on the fly with blocks where this knight (a yellow block) has to battle through some armaments and crush the uprising crocodiles to make it to a treasure chest to find treasure and go live in his castle. The crocodiles, played by Little Bun, end up running around the room (they’re red blocks), and one even rides on a hotdog bun (?) to escape the knight. It ends up being very silly.
9:23 p.m. — We spend the night before sleeping, with him going through all versions of a word to ask me if they are real words or not. Example: “Mommy, is.. BOUSE a word? COUSE? DOUSE? FOUSE?…” …. all the way down the alphabet to “ZOUSE”
We also talk about the ghost being caught be a vacuum cleaner and being snagged up by it after messing up the bathroom sink with Mommy’s makeup.
??:?? — He is all tangled up in the blanket like a burrito. I can’t even get him untangled, he is so wrapped up. I leave him, and when he shifts again, I take the opportunity to wrench the blankets out from under him and release its snakelike grip on his body.
7:00 a.m. — I slept!!!! HE SLEPT IN UNTIL 7!!! I make a tea.
8:59 a.m. — Little Bun bursts into frustration about not being able to “domino knock over the 1-blocks” he set up, but he said it so cryptically I had no idea what he was saying, and he was frustrated that he kept repeating the same thing. I finally removed him from the living room and explained that saying the same thing over and over again doesn’t mean I get it. I HEARD what he said, but his words made no sense to me. I explain how he has to use different words, etc. We finally end with him understanding that he has to be clearer.
9:28 a.m. — We spend some of the morning talking about homophones, and he makes me quiz him on different ones — see/sea, to/too/two, hear/here, there/they’re/their …..
9:44 a.m. — Little Bun makes up a story about a knight bringing sandwiches to a castle – water sandwiches (?) and a ham one, on some journey he created in his mind. I had originally started the idea with one of the blocks being a ‘knight’ battling crocodiles, and he expanded it into something else involving food.
10:12 a.m. — We spend the morning vacuuming. His favourite is this attachment which he calls an elephant trunk and says: “ROO ROO” (for an elephant sound) each time he vacuums corners and so on with it. He LOVES pulling the “trunk” in and out watching it contract and expand.
11:15 a.m. — We break for lunch, and I read a book after eating, then am roped into playing “Knight” where now we are playing hide and seek. One knight hides, the other seeks.. ?? … (they’re just blocks), and he seems to really enjoy seeking this knight in various places. I am watching a show in the background while we play this game because my brain will explode if I don’t.
12:44 p.m. — I get back to working on my book which by the way, I end up finishing: Instagram Level Up Like a Boss
3:39 p.m. — I start formatting the book for Amazon for e-book and print. This takes at least two days of pure concentration because you have to go through and fix all the formatting errors (even if you’re careful) it reveals everything.
3:41 p.m. — Little Bun is up. He eats his yoghurt and I take a small break to play with him, then I get back to the book. When I start on something I want to finish it.
5:06 p.m. — Oh and if you visit, please don’t try and break into his BBQ. He built a trap/lock for it. LOL
7:25 p.m. — Time for bed. He had dinner, I had dinner, I basically worked on the book the whole time. I also spent $29 USD on a service to help deliver digital goods but in the end, it doesn’t work for files over 25MB so … I sort of paid for nothing. Womp womp.
Spent: $29 USD
??:?? — HE SLEPT IN! I woke up BEFORE HIM. I even get to scroll on my phone while I watch him sleep like an angel.
7:00 a.m. — I get up, get him yoghurt, pasta with cheese, and I make a cup of tea. Back to the book.
8:12 a.m. — My partner is up, I am still on the book. I literally cannot focus on anything else. I am half-listening to Little Bun. He gives up and draws beside my partner, making me a pretty picture:
11:28 a.m. — I allow myself a break, and some lunch, while playing with Little Bun on the floor.
12:15 p.m. — He does his WorkBook beside me while I work on my own book. His writing has really changed a lot in just a few months!
BEFORE (few months ago)
1:00 p.m. — He goes down for his nap and I get back to work. I keep adjusting and fixing the margins, the formatting, the images… it takes forever. This is more work than writing the book itself.
2:05 p.m. — Also, my partner made this dollhouse and bought this doll for Little Bun but he has had ZERO INTEREST IN BOTH. He is into ghosts, cars, trucks, Stuffies (we play “Baby” with them and change their cloth diapers, feed them milk and burp them), and blocks. In this case, it seems to be NATURE. He isn’t into dolls and houses the way I was as a little girl (I tried with him and he was not interested).
I also tried with him for Picnics which he liked a lot because he loves food and pretends to make sandwiches out of blocks and socks…
4:40 p.m. — I eat dinner, feed him, and publish my book. I spend the evening playing with him, we do lots of Challenges.
Little Bun: Mommy, want to do a plank off challenge?
1:30 later…. *collapses*
Little Bun: I WON!!! I can plank longer!
(He crushed me. Maybe he can become my little trainer…. NEW FITNESS GOAL: To beat son in planking challenge. LOL)
4:45 p.m. — We do more yoga and other poses holding them as a challenge (side plank), for the rest of the evening. I am more flexible and can touch/hug my feet when bending forward, or touch my toes, but he is stronger in the core for sure. Or he’s cheating.
5:58 p.m. — We take a break from challenges and giggling, and read books.
7:45 p.m. — We clean up the bedroom a bit (he likes to hoard toys, books and things in the bedroom and it drives me mad), and then he reads a book with Daddy to strengthen his (weaker) language.
8:21 p.m. — Time for bedtime routine. I am tired. Also, I am sleepy. I am mentally spent. I should take a few days off before starting my fifth book.
7:22 a.m. — I wake up tired – he did sleep in but he was cold and tangled up in his blankets all night and I had to untangle him, re-pat him back to sleep and “shhh shh” …. but I couldn’t sleep again.
8:00 a.m. — In a haze I accidentally delete a book of mine off Amazon. I spend the next half hour fixing it.
8:45 a.m. — My partner is up, I do all the dishes I left in the sink last night, and dry them all, plus make some pasta for breakfast. I am hungry.
9:17 a.m. — I make a cup of matcha tea after my pasta, and then call my friend to chat. She and I were supposed to be in NYC this year around this time, and … well. Crap happens. We are both honest with each other about how blue we are feeling, but also just how strange this all is. And stressful.
10:33 a.m. — I force myself to not start on Book Number 5 after my call with her (yeah I am crazy…) and go to finish reading The Rebel Queen. I liked it but as it is historical fiction, it never really turns out well in the end for many of these women and that makes me so sad. The writing though is so beautiful, I am transported to that place and time as that person, and that is a very, very tricky thing for an author to make me feel/believe. When I find someone like that, I devour their works.
11:12 a.m. — Little Bun squeals: MOMMY! IT IS READY! The crêpe feast is happening!! Come and eat!! Everything is a feast with this little boy.
1:02 p.m. — Little Bun goes down for his nap. I make a plan to lie down for a nap but then I get caught up in making images for the book, and starting on the setup and structure.
2:47 p.m. — Little Bun is crying and won’t nap, but I can tell he needs something because he is so grumpy. I go and snuggle him, calm him down, and kiss him. I tell him just to try and close his eyes. He does it obediently.
2:47 p.m. — I work on a few mini projects while watching The Girlfriend’s Guide to Divorce. The fashion there is SO GOOD. OMG. I want every outfit in some form or another.
4:56 p.m. — He’s still sleeping. Poor baby. He really needed it, I am glad he is sleeping. I will spend the evening playing with him, jumping, doing challenges… planking, etc.
5:16 p.m. — He wakes up, crying. Very grumpy. He cries that his head is too big (he overslept), and he doesn’t want a big head with so much inside. My partner carries him. Then I carry him. Then I snuggle him like a baby. Then I play with him. He finally agrees to be carried to eat his yoghurt snack. I carry him in my arms, he eats it, and he is much better.
6:46 p.m. — We do our little Yoga Challenges – planking and so on, and he trolls me as I am planking to try and get me to fall. I end up collapsing from laughing.
7:33 p.m. — I skip dinner (pasta for breakfast and crêpes are very heavy), and end up feeding him dinner.
8:12 p.m. — I do all the dishes and set my laptops to backup, while I read: Invisible Women – A gender bias in the world. EVERYONE should read this book, it is eye-opening how “male” is defaulted in language and made a priority in everything.
A great example is masks – you’d think a mask is a mask right? Well but the masks that are made for workers in hospitals, fit a male’s head, not a female’s. We have slightly different skull structures (smaller), and that should be taken into account but it isn’t at all. Or how about how it is always freezing cold in offices? It’s set to a male’s temperature. Or the height of things – only a guy can reach it.
Or finding Viking warriors buried with weapons and assuming it’s a man. When they do DNA on the skeleton and realize that it is a woman, including the pelvis being a woman’s, they make up other reasons or excuses WHY a woman’s skeleton was buried with weapons, instead of assuming she’s a warrior (OMG IMPOSSIBLE). Even more telling, men who are buried with weapons? Not a whisper of doubt. They were warriors.
8:45 p.m. — Time for bed. I cue him, he reads his book, we brush our teeth, I wash my face, and we go to sleep.
??:?? — Little Bun screaming.
??:?? — More nightmares. He’s saying: “Blocks.. but on the iPad…” .. I have no idea what he is dreaming about but he is all tangled up in his blankets, and half cold/half too hot, and very whiny.
6:01 a.m. — FML. I feel like death. All my energy from this week, sapped. Maybe if I take a real nap today…?
6:51 a.m. — I make a cup of tea after answering emails and feed him pasta. I feel so dull today.
My poll got interesting results:
10:08 a.m. — I make something quick to eat.
12:08 p.m. — My brain is full of rocks right now. I haven’t been sleeping well – got hit with another wave of despair last night and couldn’t sleep, nor cry. And Little Bun waking me up doesn’t help either.
1:12 p.m. — He goes down for his nap.
3:12 p.m. — They’re making SO MUCH NOISE outside, and Little Bun runs out crying: I don’t any noise around my nap time!
4:25 p.m. — He goes down for a quick nap and when he’s up, he runs out refreshed.
5:56 p.m. — I end up finishing the book, and upload it. Then I start on my 5th: Publish Like a Boss
6:55 p.m. — I feed him, I feel listless. I don’t want to read. I don’t want to blog. I don’t want to answer emails. I don’t want to just sit here. I don’t want to watch videos. I’m …. SOMETHING. I end up throwing myself into the book writing process.
9:12 p.m. — OK really time for bed. I got Endless Learning Academy (free trial for a month) for Little Bun and he loves the music portion as well as the “Art” section. Why they don’t have these as separate apps, I’ll never know. Or I do know. It is so you subscribe to the Academy and don’t buy the other apps separately, and pay a subscription fee ($60 USD a year) instead.
??:?? — I wake up tired. Little Bun has been getting cold, then crying out and squealing all night.
6:30 a.m. — I make half a cup of tea (I am rationing the milk), and feed him yoghurt, then pasta. In that order, and very specifically heated up in the microwave for only 20 seconds.
7:15 a.m. — I continue on the book. I have so many notes in my head, I keep forgetting to write them down and then I’ll go and think I am finished, and go back again to add more information.
9:27 a.m. — I take a break, and browse Instagram. Little Bun crawls up beside his father and starts drawing a secret picture for me:
12:08 p.m. — Time for his nap, after he plays with Daddy. He came up with some complicated game with a sock ball being thrown into a box and then the box moves as you throw it, but you have to hit a certain angle of the box to get bonus points….
12:12 p.m. — I shove the phone at him to play SnapChat (he likes the games and quizzes), and take short nap, my entire brain is so fatigued.
1:15 p.m. — Down for his nap.
1:54 p.m. — Still not hungry. Shouldn’t I eat something? I feel like this virus talk is just making me spiral into something very dark.
1:59 p.m. — I focus back on the book, and continue writing.
2:59 p.m. — Little Bun knocks, is up, has his yoghurt, and I finally make something to eat. Hot ramen-style vegan noodles would hit the spot. My partner finally found a stash of nutritional yeast (I was rationing that too), and bought cayenne pepper which I am now working up towards 3 pinchfuls into each bow.
3:59 p.m. — I feel so sad. And sleepy. I don’t even have energy to play with Little Bun or humour him and it is hurting his feelings, I can see that he gets sad when I won’t play with him. I just don’t have the energy for it. I feel trapped.
4:30 p.m. — I try to rally some energy to do workbook activities with him, but he doesn’t want to do that, or read. He ends up choosing Endless Academy to play with the music notes again, and asks me about the quarter notes, half notes, 3-quarter notes and whole notes. I explain them all, including 8th notes. I guess this will stand in for him not playing or practicing on the piano this summer. Not that I was very keen on it, but I did plan on buying a piano this year but then COVID-19 hit and I lost my extra income from my contract to be able to do that.
To be clear – the piano I am thinking of is $30K because I am too used to nice sounding ones, and I cannot play on a crappy one. I am not a concert pianist or amazing by any means but if I am going to buy something that I will personally enjoy and use often to practice on, it better be amazing. Plus I need it to be able to be used with headphones so I can practice and play without anyone being bothered. You can retrofit regular pianos to have this SilentPlay installed.
5:09 p.m. — I do all the dishes, then a load of laundry.
5:45 p.m. — Little Bun is quiet for a good 30 minutes and then tells me: I MADE A NOTE FOR YOU!
If you can’t read it, I drew it out for you:
“The Party Starts At Night”
6:37 p.m. — I am inspired to wear my trench dresses more as long dusters with this picture. I can’t pull off mustard yellow but this is striking:
7:27 p.m. — I play with Little Bun, we make up a game with a maze, and colours, and he is just so sweet and loving. I know I snap at him and I get angry, and am short-tempered, and yell at him for every little thing it seems, but it’s like I am numbly looking into my body as I am doing it and raging, KNOWING I SHOULD NOT. I have to try and break this. I think sleep will be the key.
9:15 p.m. — We fall asleep without stories. He asked for Lucy Lobster or a Ghost Story but I was too tired to come up with one (sad, and fatigued), and he didn’t want to do one either. So we just drift off into dreamless sleep.
??:?? — I wake up, and stress.
??:?? — I wake up and worry about life.
??:?? — I wake up and can’t go back to sleep, my brain is churning.
6:00 a.m. — My partner is cooking today, so I grab all of our billions of electronics and move into the bedroom to keep him entertained.
7:59 a.m. — I end up pulling out the Baby Animals Sticker book to keep him entertained. Works like a charm.
8:25 a.m. — I close off comments on a post that I did back in 2016 and people are STILL finding and commenting on. Enough. I’m sick of repeating myself that if there is no demand for your degree, then you supplying it has $0 value on the market.
It isn’t “unsubstantiated opinion”, it’s what people are seeing on the market, otherwise they wouldn’t be asking the question of why they can’t get a job with their degree. If there was no substance at all to what I am saying (DEMAND for degree is what drives your job market value), then we wouldn’t have this issue now would we?
People have even had the gall to message me, asking me what to do prefacing it with “I am a new student studying a degree that will be in a low-paying professiona”.
… I don’t even know what to say. YOU ALREADY KNOW WHAT IS WRONG.
Most people already know what they have to do. They just can’t/won’t/are too scared to do it.
How to fix it? That’s up to you to decide what you’re willing to undertake (switching degrees is not uncommon). If I were about to enter school these days, I’d be researching what jobs are out there that pay good salaries and would be in demand. Then, I’d check to see what I could do / like to do (if you don’t at least enjoy your job in some way, you won’t make good money or be happy doing it), and from there, narrow down my choices and pick something that PAYS THE DAMN BILLS. /rant over
Then I get great messages like this, and I know I am reaching some people:
10:08 a.m. — I spend the morning trying on clothes in my closet, ready to axe the ones that I can no longer fit into, and a pleasant surprise awaited me. A red blazer that was a tiny bit too tight in the arms when I first got it, fits just right now – you can see just in the photo, the sleeve just under the shoulder is a tiny bit too tight:
And some white pants I was literally sucking in my stomach just to zip up, zip up fine and even have a little room to wiggle in.
(These white pants were getting tight before, you can’t see the waist, but it was pinching slightly in this photo.)
I must have lost weight during all of this from cutting out my Starbucks drinks, little cakes/snacks here and there, meals in restaurants, and other such processed ready-made cakes and snacks from my local cafe/grocery store. Just in 2 months of not adding on those extra calories, and doing very light exercise (if any), the weight has dropped off, as I cut back on those calories. O_o
1:06 p.m. — Little Bun goes down for a nap after lunch.
5:22 p.m. — Little Bun wanted to defeat the laws of physics with some game he was playing and melted into a puddle of tears and my partner just got cross and left him “he’s not making any sense!!”… to which kicked off my own rant: “HE IS A CHILD. He doesn’t understand the laws of PHYSICS. EXPLAIN it to him and listen to him.” I honestly think the emotional labour women take on, is definitely full of these stories. They just get things like this pushed on them because there’s a lack of support. That’s not to say my partner doesn’t support me but he has a LOT OF WORK to do on the emotional side.
5:45 p.m. — After I solved that, Little Bun “recharges” like a robot (I wrap him in a blanket and he counts 10,20,30,40…), and when he is fully “charged”, he’s fine. It’s kind of cute. He talks in a baby robot voice and says things like: “Baby. Needs. To. Recharge.” … and then I have to tap his head (his button) and say: “Help. What does Baby Need?” … and he responds back with what he wants “Baby. Wants. To. Nest.” … and I have to build a nest, or sing to him, or read a book to him, give him 20 kisses…. When he recharges, he lies down on his back, eyes closed, and counts in tens to 100 until he says: “Fully. Charged.”
I even made him once, recharge for 10 minutes lying quietly for quiet time so I could have a break. I am a #ParentingGenius.
6:49 p.m. — Proof that supermodels can wear anything and be called ‘stunning style icons’ and for the rest of us, we put on the EXACT same outfit and we’ve “dialed it in”:
7:03 p.m. — I get into a discussion online and realize that everyone else but me, has been putting market not municipal value for their assets like their home.
To recap, we paid $579K when we bought the home, and it was right at a lull in the market prices (almost near the bottom). Almost right after we bought it, prices started to pick back up a few months later, and we saw similar homes around us start to sell for $650K or more. Guess I better call a realtor.
8:22 p.m. — We get ready for bed. We read books, play a game with his stuffies and treasures, feeding them, etc. I wash all the dishes as well so the kitchen is clean for tomorrow.
9:15 p.m. — Time for bed.
Want more? Read all of my previous Week of Money Diaries.