What is my perfect happiness?
My idea of a perfect happiness is pretty wide and varied.
I’d say that right now, at this moment, I have the perfect happiness happening.
It sounds so cliché, but really… not at all.
With my partner, things have been rocky once in a while in our relationships, but we are generally pretty good. We mesh well, we enjoy each other’s company, we talk, we laugh.
I could do with more Daddy Alone time as in chatting and just being a couple without Little Bun, but that is not going to happen for a while, so I try and sneak it in on Sunday mornings, Saturdays, when he is napping, and when we come home from work and I manage to get him preoccupied and quiet with something so we can have a decent adult conversation where half my brain is not on Little Bun and unable to focus.
I miss him.
I miss talking to him without having half a brain pre-occupied, watching Little Bun.
I know these days are to be cherished with Little Bun, but sometimes I feel like it is at a sacrifice of our relationship.
Even so, I would not change anything for now. This, is a perfect happiness. A bit of bad, a lot of good.
Little Bun is finally over the Threenager stage that hit us way harder than Terrible Twos, and so far is not really showing major signs of the F*cking Fours which I hear some parents experience as their kids develop their attitudes and defiance later.
Right now, Little Bun’s attitude is manageable.
Yes I am tired, yes, I am trying my best to stay zen, calm and to not yell and scream at him (I think it may be helping, but the ear splitting shrieks are not fabulous in keeping this resolve when you’re in the throes of a screaming tantrum), and I find he listens to me more if I explain things, and has started accepting “No” as a valid reason.
He doesn’t fight and scream as much as he did before when I tell him “No” now. He has accepted that “No”, means “No”, and there is no point in screaming about it.
I’m pretty set in my ways and he has learned that. He is just.. SO MUCH better.
Career-wise, I am working, the client is a good close commute for me, Little Bun is in the preschool nearby AND I have a COVERED parking spot, so this is sweeeeeeet.
I am very happy here, save for the pressure I am starting to feel with new management issues..
I love what I do, I am good at it.. I am on a great team as well.
I have figured out a way around it though so I am back to feeling super happy and light.
It could be better but honestly, pulling in $1000 a month is no small change. (This is how I do it.)
It really does help the budget now that I am no longer spending that money on shopping (LOL)… and I am planning on funnelling it into investing instead.
I have a new plan for the money. A more constructive channel for my money, and I am happy about it.
I also really love this. I’m so happy and grateful for all of you to keep me going. It may not pay out versus ALL of the work and hours I put into the blog (I earn way less than minimum wage on the blog, truth be told), but it is fun and I am happy.
The only thing I’d probably want to improve in this “perfect happiness” scenario is having a little spa time once in a while, but the last time I tried to do something for myself, I ended up breaking out for the next few months.
I guess I just want more free time to myself.
While also having more time with my family. 😛
It is a hard balance, we only have so many waking hours, and right now it feels like work and family takes up the bulk of it, blogging sneaks in there somehow, and then my own personal life gets shoved in the rest of the cracks (mostly enjoyed while I am running errands)…
Right now my Self and my Partner are on the backburner if I am to be honest, and the rest is taking forefront, but it will soon shift where Little Bun won’t want me or need me as often (*sob*).. and it will shift the focus back onto myself and my Partner.