??:?? — Bloodcurdling scream. I lean over, I see the blankets came off (oh, at least there’s a reason), and I pull them back over him (two layers), and he promptly falls back asleep.
??:?? — Little Bun stands up moves around and then comes close and says: Mommy, did you get more sleep today? .. I respond back that yes, I feel better than yesterday.
7:48 a.m. — And no wonder! Almost a full extra hour.
7:55 a.m. — I log in and work. I hope my manager has cancelled today’s meeting. PLEASE.
8:01 a.m. — No such luck.
10:14 a.m. — Off my call and working. Little Bun is a bit put out: “Mommy, when will you be done?“… and I tell him: “Little Bun I am working. I won’t be done until at least 11:30“… and I ask him: “Do you want me to play a little with you and then go back to work?” .. He shakes his head and goes to his father: “DADDY! I WANT TO PLAY!“… and his father takes this chance to bathe him instead. I won’t get a break until at least 11:30, and then I can have my lunch and hop back on a call.
10:30 a.m. — He’s now glued to my side like barnacle. ZERO PERSONAL SPACE, he leans on me, even wants to put his leg up onto mine so he can sit on my lap but I can’t work like this.
11:30 a.m. — Break. I finished going through some documents, and my brain is spinning.
1:01 p.m. — He’s down for his nap and I am on a call.
2:56 p.m. — Call over, I take a break.
4:20 p.m. — I take my eyes off him and he colours hearts (he is obsessed with them, rainbows and the word “love”), on the back of my chequebook. I tell him very quickly to please not draw or colour in my actual cheques themselves.
5:10 p.m. — I work a bit more and then shut down for the holidays.
6:47 p.m. — Dinner time, then we read together. He also makes up his own Chess game that sort of makes no sense because you have to decide ahead of time which team should win.
8:31 p.m. — OK enough of this. We fold laundry and then time for bed.
??:?? — I wake up and Little Bun asks again: Mommy are you okay? Did you sleep enough? … I tell him: Baby, if you’re awake, Mommy’s awake. Please don’t worry about me.
7:11 a.m. — I make tea and he helps me happily whisking it (he’s not very good), and he enjoys helping as much as he can, including getting the tea tin, spooning in the matcha… everything.
7:55 a.m. — He does workbook, even though it is a holiday, and he technically has no school, this is not a day he is getting ‘off’ because it is a quiet activity as well and he enjoys it. When he finishes his pages, he looks at me and says: Mommy, this is too easy for me. I am in Grade 2 at least already.. I look at him and tell him I know, but we have to do this book as ‘proof’ for the school board, and then we will move on to tougher subjects.
9:15 a.m. — I am on the phone with my friend.
11:30 a.m. — After my call (we talk about everything), I do the dishes, play with Little Bun and then he goes down for quiet time.
1:01 p.m. — “Mommy, do you like this colour?” … *shows me his pinched finger* .. I reply back that I certainly do, it’s a pretty colour, and he beams and informs me: “I call it SUNRISE!”
1:04 p.m. — His quiet time is my quiet time too, and I go and sit under the therapy lamp and read a book.
5:26 p.m. — Little Bun annoys me a little and I snap at him, and his face turns immediately wobbly and he bursts into tears. I go after him into the bedroom and he sobs: “You don’t love me any more“.. and I fiercely snuggle him and tell him that this will NEVER HAPPEN. He can infuriate me, break everything I own, ruin everything I have, and yell at me, and hurt me badly, but I will never, ever under any circumstance, stop loving him. I hug him tight and ask him if he heard me. NEVER.
5:50 p.m. — In the closet, we Upcycle. The hours pass.
He loves this lace ring and makes me take a picture:
He also makes a heart out of chains and then edits the photo to make it a real heart.
6:20 p.m. — I finally remember there’s dinner and we eat.
7:45 p.m. — I finish dishes, and am just thinking about things.
7:32 p.m. — I love how obsessed this jealous troll “Mizzy” (a.k.a. JD in real life) is with me, she’s really become rather unhinged in the past comment (it was mildly disturbing, the way she wrote in disjointed sentences). I was approving her comments but now, I think I’ll just simply delete them to infuriate her.
I know she reads all of my posts, word for word (she’s truly jealous of me and my life remember?), so she’ll see this for sure.
You would think it’s flattering but really, it’s just pathetic that people have nothing better to do with their time than vomit hate onto an online stranger. In the end, I pity her – it’s all rather sad if you think about it.
7:49 p.m. — A friend sent me a bunch of funny parenting tweets and these are my favourites:
8:00 p.m. — My mother sent along the NORAD Santa Tracker and Little Bun loves watching him fly over the world, even though he knows Santa doesn’t exist, he sees him as a ‘real’ character like Daffy Duck or Elmo. Mommy! Santa is wearing a mask!
8:34 p.m. — I do all the dishes to prep for the ‘feast’ tomorrow (as Little Bun calls it). As Little Bun did the cutlery he said: “Mommy, why did the fork stop talking?“… I asked him if the fork talked to begin with, and he told me it said: “Shhhhhhh”
8:54 p.m. — Then it’s time for bed. Instead of Christmas books, I make up an elaborate Christmas story with Santa Claus and a gingerbread man that comes alive. When I am talking about Mrs. Claus baking the cookies, Little Bun frowns and says: You mean HE, not SHE. And I switch the baker to Santa Claus, as it should be – it wasn’t right to have anyone but Santa bake those cookies!
??:?? — I wake up feeling rather refreshed. He didn’t squeal!!!!!
??:?? — He is a bit grumpy though, and the day starts with a little whining.
7:47 a.m. — Sure enough, he’s complaining about things, in that whiny tone that children employ when they’re overtired, or just feeling out of sorts.
8:04 a.m. — We make my tea together, and he complains again, so I shoo him out of the kitchen, annoyed.
8:08 a.m. — Checking my emails, I get money from reselling my YSL bag. I decided it was just an awkward size, too large for regular everyday use, and too small for the office because I’d need to cram a laptop in there. If I only had a small tablet, it would work well for the office +$1350
8:21 a.m. — He starts on his workbook. I call it workbook, he gives me a strange look and I amend it to activity book because that’s really what he wants to call it. No rest for him today, 3 pages! Honestly I just want this book finished so that we can move on to harder concepts/things, because this is too easy for him.
9:08 a.m. — We play in the closet. He loves being in there with me making ‘pancakes’ out of clay for me …
10:20 a.m. — “Mommy? I am getting dizzy.” Alarmed, I ask him why and it turns out he just wants to stop and eat but usually when I want to stop, I say I am getting dizzy (because I am), and he’s picked up that habit and tells me he is dizzy because he is hungry. We pack up, and go eat something. My partner made fresh bread today:
1:01 p.m. — He goes down for his nap while I watch Fear City – New York vs The Mafia. A great documentary.
1:39 p.m. — Fantastic documentary to watch while I am working on my budget for 2021.
3:04 p.m. — Up from his “nap” he raps on the door and squeals: YAYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! which never fails to make me laugh.
3:47 p.m. — My partner is on a Skype family call and Little Bun is on his lap, asking questions about snow, what they ate…
4:53 p.m. — After dinner, he watches Sesame Street, and I want to finish this Mafia documentary.
5:42 p.m. — I play with Little Bun, then feed him, and then he watches Sesame Street as I watch Self-Made the first self-made millionaire in the U.S. in 1919.
8:12 p.m. — I finish watching all of Self-Made too as well… My budget is also finished, for 2021.. I am going to aim for $25K, challenge is $20K… but that is like serious no holds barred shopping bans and simply or upcycling (I need stones and things to continue)…
9:30 p.m. — Time for bed.
??:?? — We talk until ..??.. and I tell him that for Grade 2, he may have to stay home another year and be homeschooled by Mommy. I explain that we have to be sure the virus is gone, and it sounds like not everyone will be vaccinated until at least next year, and also the vaccinations do not prevent you from getting the virus but makes the symptoms less severe, which isn’t the same thing.
And I say: Thoughts? Anything you want to ask or tell me? …. and he tells me: I think it might be a good idea if I stayed home another year as well. Just to be sure. .. He’s such an easygoing child. I tell him how much I do love having him at home with me, and being with him all the time even though sometimes it might be stressful or we fight, and I am cherishing the 24/7 time with him.
??:?? — He is VERY cuddly tonight. He’s sleeping on me, on my side, curled up tight against me (the entire bed is empty, and I am squished to the corner with him in my nook), and I wrap an arm around him and fall back asleep.
??:?? — Little Bun bounces up to me and says: Mommy? How about today? Did you sleep enough? I smile and tell him I do feel better today.
8:05 a.m. — I put away the dishes, and then do banking stuff. I transfer money for bills, check on things, and basically need time to think about what I want to do with my money going forward. I think I’ll invest it all in the market and until this virus is under control / over (2022? 2024?) I don’t want to have $300K in cash just sitting there for 4 years doing nothing.
9:22 a.m. — Banking over, Little Bun is playing beside me, waiting for me to finish my banking list very nicely. He pushes his chair right up next to mine and is less than one paw away from me.
10:02 a.m. — Family Skype Call, and my partner as usual, gets zero gossip. Little Bun is a tiny bit less shy now and is asking questions about the snow where they’re from, and if it rained lately. He asks to see “his” dog whom he played with last time he was there, but they tell him the dog is sleeping. (All the dogs he knows, are his dogs by the way, because we will never get a pet as we are highly allergic.)
10:27 a.m. — I go into the bedroom confused, I thought he ran in here? Then I see a lump on the bed giggling, covered in a blanket and I pretend: “WHERE IS HE!? I thought he came in here!“… he throws off the blanket and squeals: SURPRISE MOMMY!! When you see a lump on the bed, it’s me!!!
11:36 a.m. — After lunch, Little Bun sets up dominoes he created out of blocks and knocks them down.
1:01 p.m. — Nap time! For him anyway. I set to work redoing my pedicure (Little Bun picked out my nail colour).
2:56 p.m. — He knocks on the door squealing: YAYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
5:30 p.m. — He watches me recording him with his father as he is making up a game, and he smiles for the camera, looks away, and slides his eyes back to smile again. It’s so cute.
5:45 p.m. — This is the math game he made up, where every line has to equal 15.
8:53 p.m. — We read in silence together – him using my phone and me on my ebook reader until it is time to get ready for bed.
??:?? — I wake up to Little Bun squealing, and I wrap another blanket around him. Mollified by extra warmth, he falls back asleep and so do I.
??:?? — He sits up like a groundhog in bed, and of course it wakes me, so I reach over to hug him and he crawls on top, where I rub his back, kiss his head and hug him close to me for a few seconds.
8:10 a.m. — Hot water is out. I am unable to do dishes, shower, and flushing the toilet with the low run of water doesn’t seem very wise at the moment (it shudders unhappily), and I don’t want to break it.
8:13 a.m. — I feel so bleh today. I might have to sit under my therapy light lamp.
10:30 a.m. — I do all the dishes after finally getting hot water back.
12:28 p.m. — Lunchtime! Paella, and then yoghurt for dessert.
1:16 p.m. — I make a tea and then I read (and finish my books).
3:50 p.m. — I am watching This Is Us (Beth Pearson is MY FAVOURITE character on this show by far. She is amazing.) Little Bun creates this art installation out of his crayons, insists he has to take a photograph and tells me he named it: “The Rainbow Memo”
I told my partner we could exhibit this photo and ask people to comment on what the artist intended by the name.
5:25 p.m. — Let’s play the hugging game, Mommy! No rules in the hugging game, we just hug and hug., and he leaps into my lap and hugs me.
6:05 p.m. — We play a new chess game he invented. I think he’s been watching too much of The Queen’s Gambit with me, and has made up his own checkerboard/chess game equivalent with blocks where the rules have been determined to be:
- We decide who is going to win first, by having the player who moves first, be the winner. So if you’re playing for Yellow and you move first, you will win and everyone on the board will help you win.
- You have to get the opposite colour on your side, into the middle in the X. So Yellow, has one Green block that has to move to the middle.
- All moves have to be the full length of the board. If you move left, you have to move all the way left, through all the empty spaces. You can only be stopped or stop before a space, if there is another block blocking you from moving all the way to the end.
- The trick to winning I have found, is to try and get blocks surrounding the X to be in place, so that when you move your opposing colour block, it stops right on the X because it’s been boxed in
It’s actually kind of fun / challenging with these rules, and we play a few games.
8:01 p.m. — Little Bun has schooling with Daddy.
8:47 p.m. — Who’s the baby tonight, I ask him? .. I made up this new game called “I am the Baby”, and we have to now take turns tucking each other in, giving kisses, closing the door and turning out the light. Honestly, it’s because some nights I am so tired, and he takes forever to get ready for bed (arranging pillows, Stuffies, blanket shenanigans); I just want to lie in my bed, close my eyes and have him be the parent while I lay there like a ‘baby’, making ‘baby noises’. He loves pretending to take care of me, so this plays right into his strong suit.
??:?? — I wake up .. and it feels early. There’s no asking if I slept enough because he knows I didn’t.
6:00 a.m. — SIX. SIX I TELL YOU. I suspect he will nap a little today.
7:59 a.m. — The morning is a blur of activity book, tea, and Little Bun asking me to clarify if the book was referring to a regular pentagon / hexagon or irregular in this grade one book. He knows irregular/regular because we started on Grade 4 math before COVID hit, and then I had to revert him back to Grade One for ministry ‘proof’ that he completed it.
8:08 a.m. — He spends the morning watching Stillwater, a fantastic TV series made by Malilika Chopra from these philosophical children’s books I love from Jon J. Muth:
12:08 p.m. — Little Bun colours in the fish, and my mother via email, is giving him suggestions on how to add details, algae, a mouth, bubbles.. and at first he is upset: “I don’t want suggestions!” .. and I tell him that his grandmother is HELPING him see things in a different way so that later on, people will ask: Who was your inspiration? And you can say.. GRANDMA.
The final result was this. It was originally a plain orange fish, and then she emailed in ideas (imagine 3 rounds of emails):
12:28 p.m. — This is true.
1:12 p.m. — Down for his quiet time / nap (I think he will sleep a little, we woke up very early), I schedule a few blog posts and review my 2021 budget.
1:48 p.m. — I finish and then switch off to read my books. I set a goal for 100 for 2021, seeing as I read 200 books in 2020. But my real stretch goal is 200 books again.
4:05 p.m. — He tells me my book is sleeping so he tucked it in to bed. This child!
5:25 p.m. — He ALWAS perks up when I tell him we should go Upcycle, and he happily runs into my closet. As we play Christmas music (we enjoy Michael Bublé), he makes his own xylophone out of some beads and uses his favourite pointed tooth bead (I will never be able to upcycle it now), to “tap” along with the music:
6:08 p.m. — After playing a bit, I tell him my headache is starting (it’s raining and very dull outside), and he immediately hops up and tells me he wants to eat his dinner (vegetable stew).
6:36 p.m. — He still doesn’t get the iPad today because he was very naughty yesterday, and we took it away for him for one day. He tells me bravely: I do not need the iPad or a lot of screen time because it isn’t as fun as playing, and it’s more fun to play, and more energy efficient!!!
6:40 p.m. — Little Bun asks if my head is hurting because he sees me hold my fingers to my eyes and forehead and close them. He asks where it hurts, I tell him my temples and he rubs them for me. “Is that better?”
7:04 p.m. — I don’t bother doing the dishes, I am tired. I watch more of the new show Stylish with Jenna Lyons. She doesn’t dye her hair, hasn’t had any surgery or falsifying of her features, and I find her incredibly intriguing, smart, and WONDERFUL. I have even more respect for her now than before.
7:40 p.m. — I try to read my book but I can’t get into it. My brain hurts, I have a headache.. Little Bun has this new habit of laughing like a maniac (VERY LOUDLY I might add) – not sure where he learned this.
6:40 p.m. — Little Bun sees me close my eyes and put my fingers to my eyes again and asks me where the pain is. I tell him in my eyeballs. He asks me if he can sing a song to help them, I smile, take him to the bedroom and he launches into a (tone deaf) recital of how to care for my eyes which goes loosely like this:
“Dear eyeballs, you’re hurting. It’s okay, just close your eyes and take a rest. No more screen time because it might hurt them more, you should close your eyes instead. Mommy needs to take a rest, and sleep, and maybe the next day it will be better and less painful. Eyeballs close, eyeballs close…”
It’s so sweet. <3
8:12 p.m. — Time for bed. We get ready, and then spend the night reading beside each other (me on a real book, not an e-reader).
??:?? — I wake up a bit tired. It’s rough.
6:30 a.m. — I make my tea, and Little Bun is full of energy, wanting to chat, play golf with the Stuffies, and I beg him to let me drink my tea first in peace (Nope. I don’t get that either). The chat includes tidbits like this:
Little Bun: I am making a banana bread but it isn’t something you like I think, it has sprinkles, icing, and food colouring..
Me: I don’t like food colouring or sprinkles.
Little Bun: Why?
Me: Because sprinkles to Mommy, tastes like plastic, and food colouring tastes bitter to Mommy.
Little Bun: Oh. But I’ve never had sprinkles or food colouring.
Me: I know, because it’s disgusting!
Little Bun: But how do I know this unless I try it? I have to try it to know if I don’t like it or like it or not?
Me: EXCELLENT POINT. You’re right. You need to try everything once before you make up your mind.
Little Bun: Or at least seven times. You need to try things seven times before deciding if you like it or not.
Me: Yes. That’s true.
7:28 a.m. — We sit on the floor and play. The playing is full of fun surprises and gems:
Little Bun: Biggest Stuffie won’t wake up!! HE WILL NEVER WAKE UP!
Me: No, you just need to pat him on his back and say: Dearest Biggest Stuffie, good morning!
Little Bun: Okay. *pat pat pat* Wake up Biggest Stuffie! I love you! Good morning!
Babiest Stuffie (played by Little Bun): Have you ever tried ‘dressing’ Biggest Stuffie?
Biggest Stuffie (played Me): No never I DON’T LIKE IT!
Babiest Stuffie: But you have to try it before you say you don’t like it!
Biggest Stuffie: Oh that makes sense. You’re right. Let me try it.
Babiest Stuffie: Let me make you a burger! *makes the burger, grills it, cuts the bread, makes cooking noises as he goes through this whole process* It’s ready!!!
Biggest Stuffie: Okay, let’s SHARE!
*eating noises* om nom nom nom…
Babiest Stuffie (played by Little Bun): How about honey? Have you ever tried it? It’s bee vomit but it is so delicious.
Note: My mother sent a video on how honey is made, which shows how the bees vomit into each others’ mouths to make the honey. It isn’t necessarily bee VOMIT, but it sure looks like it on the video and is easy to understand.
Biggest Stuffie (played Me): Okay, I am wiling to try anything at least once! Even bee vomit!
Babiest Stuffie: It’s delicious. Let’s toast some bread for it. *sizzle sizzle*.. let me check to see if it’s ready. OUCH! It’s too hot!!!
Biggest Stuffie: Oh no! Are you okay!?
Babiest Stuffie: I forgot my gloves. Let me go find them, and then I can test again. *makes noises finding his gloves* (which by the way are imaginary). Okay, I am ready. *tests the toasted bread again with a paw* It’s ready! Nice and warm.
Biggest Stuffie: Okay, can I please spread on the honey?
Babiest Stuffie: Sure.
Biggest Stuffie: *spread spread spread*
Babiest Stuffie: Time to eat!
*eating noises* om nom nom nom…
8:15 a.m. — I bake some of my projects (spoiler alert, my new style of just using the clay like glue for the stones, doesn’t pan out and I have to rethink the pieces):
9:05 a.m. — I start laundry.
9:30 a.m. — Mommy, the Stuffies made a heart for New Years!!!
9:45 a.m. — He finishes his activity book pages in no time because he’s doing work smart things like this – can I bring your attention to him putting the capital letters where they should go instead of rewriting it out!?
9:56 a.m. — He tells me: But I’ve never played a video game, because we don’t have a TV, and we don’t have a video game.
Me: I know. And you won’t. We don’t get a TV or a video game console. But you play games on the apps all the time like on my iPhone or the iPad.
Little Bun: That’s true. Tint is a very relaxing iPad colour game.
10:22 a.m. — Little Bun folds and puts away the dried kitchen laundry, then wipes down the cutlery while I do all the dishes.
10:53 a.m. — Little Bun checks in on me: Are you doing okay Mommy? How’s it going with your dishwashing? I reply back that it’s going good, and I ask him how he’s doing with his towel folding. He chirps back: Well! I finished all the blue ones, I also layered the handkerchiefs and then I am going to fold the orange ones next.
11:15 a.m. — We spend the rest of the morning replying to my mother’s emails.
11:25 a.m. — I ask him what he’d like to do while he waits for the banana bread to be ready. He looks at me very cutely, and says: “Umm. how’s your head feeling Mommy? Are you feeling okay?” I respond back that I am all right, and he says: “Then let’s UPCYCLE!“… and he runs into the bedroom.
1:01 p.m. — He goes down for his nap, but really, it’s just quiet time for all of us.
1:05 p.m. — I am working on the blog.
3:14 p.m. — After his nap, he makes up his own maze games on the iPad which he does for an hour and a half, while I finish up a blog posts.
4:29 p.m. — OK time for him to eat.
5:37 p.m. — We are in the closet now, upcycling together, painting… he loves it. He doesn’t ask permission though and I WISH HE WOULD. Sometimes things are drying, and he wants to help (I know), but … ARRRG. In the closet, I got a present along with a coat I purchased, and it’s a beautiful bird with feathers and crystals. And he loves it so much. He even started crying a little and I was alarmed: What happened!?
Little Bun: It’s just so.. beautiful. *sob* *tears coming out*
7:31 p.m. — We stop, clean up and then play Snakes and Ladders.
8:09 p.m. — We break for a snack (wow we were in there long), and then Little Bun goes to school with Daddy online.
8:47 p.m. — Time for bed! I am reading…
Want more? Read all of my previous Week of Money Diaries.