In Discussions, Discussions, Life, Style

The New Normal: Beauty and its Beast

When I was younger, my friends and I would hang out after school, and inevitably the question of: What do you hate about your looks and what would you change? ..would come up.

Other girls answered that they hated their nose, or that they wished they had smaller hips.

My only answer was that I wished I had perfect, smooth, pimple-free skin.

Now, my skin wasn’t so bad that I would have needed to take medication like Accutane, but it was not great, and I knew it, even if I didn’t know it was processed and junk foods I was allergic to, which was causing my skin to break out so often.

Sadly, most girls can probably relate to this exercise.

But I can’t imagine boys will know what we’re even talking about.

Today, if you asked me the same question, I’d say: Not a damn thing.

(Especially since I discovered that eating real, unprocessed food really makes a difference in your skin. I’m good to go.)

PLASTIC SURGERY: THE NEW NORMAL LOOK OF ‘BEAUTY’

I have known for a very long time that no cream or potion no matter how expensive, will erase your wrinkles — only surgery can make those tell-tale lines puff back up to what they used to be.

The best thing you can do for your skin is moisturize, wear lots of sunscreen and to be stress-free.


So therefore I am not passing TOO much judgement on cosmetic surgery as being a bad thing (I know quite a few people who have had Botox), but it just frustrates me that it’s considered normal to get a quick injection to ‘solve’ our beauty problems.

Little wrinkles at 30? Botox. Facelift.

Angelina Jolie lips? Lip fillers.

Just saw a picture of some Victoria’s Secret models? Get a boob job.

(Ironically, a padded, lifted bra would feel too fake.)

There is always a surgical solution for your body and your face to fight Mother Nature.

Now in all the beauty magazines I read (vapid I know), they’ve started listing out cosmetic surgeons to visit, what celebrities do to their skin and worst of all, suggestions for women under the age of 30 to start considering Botox to ward off the passage of time.

It’s affecting teens too: Parents are now gifting new high school graduates with plastic surgery.

Although teens make up just 2 percent of cosmetic surgery patients in the United States, their numbers have grown.

In 2006, procedures performed on kids ages 13 to 19 totalled 244,124, including about 47,000 nose jobs and 9,000 breast augmentations, according to the American Society of Plastic Surgeons (ASPS).

It has become so prevalent to NOT look your age or to want to be someone you are not, it’s scary.

I get that wanting to look attractive, means that you feel better, and people treat you better.

But why not stick to makeup, wearing flattering clothes, keeping your body healthy inside and out, and having a natural, sexy confidence instead?

That’s much more attractive than some Barbie-doll or Ken-doll look-a-like who you can’t even talk to.

IT ISN’T JUST FOR THAT CRAZY CELEBRITY ANY MORE

I used to think it was only kept in the realm of celebrities, because they’re crazy and actresses in particular HAVE to look young or they don’t get the job. No one wants to hire older women as their real ages, which is a cryin’ shame.

On top of that, they have to deal with so much pressure in life, paparazzi snapping their photographs when they just want a damn cup of coffee in the morning while walking their dogs — that’s bound to make any sane person snap.

I’d probably snap with a huge box of macarons, where you’d find me lost in a sugar haze, ranting and raving uncontrollably.

..but now the woman you work with, is raving about how amazing Botox is and how it’s changed her life, and you KNOW that accountant on the 20th floor is suddenly sporting a new chest.

WTF?

THE BEAST IN ALL OF US

All this talk about plastic surgery makes you start to wonder if you should do something about those lines around your mouth, even before hitting the age of 30 (*raises hand*), until you snap back to reality and think:


This is ridiculous. It isn’t normal.

Let’s just keep wearing sunscreen, eating well, doing good things for others, smiling, being happy, and stressing less about things that don’t matter.

Honestly, you can tell who has had surgery and who hasn’t.

I’m sure Nicole Kidman denied for years she was Botoxing, but that woman couldn’t move her forehead, her cheeks or her lips without looking like she was in pain. She was a great actress trapped in a mannequin’s face, pumped full and frozen with chemicals.

Don’t even get me started on Joan Rivers, or any of the Housewives on TV.

joan-rivers

Via

It has affected male celebrities too.

Bruce Jenner used to look like the only normal human being on the Kardashian show, and now he scares me.

bruce-jenner

Via

Aging gracefully is a lost art these days.

Can’t we just accept that collagen disappears from our face, and it gives us character?

Once you start seeing those minor, MINOR “imperfections” as a result of natural aging, you start to see everything else as being bad.

People are addicted to plastic surgery, and will go back for 20 or more rounds just to look perfect, without realizing that looking this so-called ‘perfect’ is really imperfect.

What’s beautiful in people, is their natural imperfections. Cindy Crawford’s mole on the left side of her lip, or Kirsten Dunst’s vampire-ish teeth.

So what is it all for anyway?

To look younger so that you stay beautiful and attractive to everyone around you?

Everyone will eventually find out that you’re 45. So what’s the harm in being 45?

What is this crazy need to look 19 when you AREN’T?

Not only that, other signs give it away — your deeply wrinkled necks, spotted backs of your hands, and everywhere else you haven’t Botoxed or lifted to oblivion.

I also wouldn’t want to hug my mother or look at her comfortably, if she scared me with her windblown face and perpetually surprised expression.

People, the Emperor has no clothes!!

It is not beautiful nor is it fooling anyone.


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Sherry of Save. Spend. Splurge.

I got out of $60,000 of debt in 18 months using TheBudgetingTool.com. Since then, I have worked 50% of my career (taking 1-2 year breaks), and quadrupled my income within 2 years of graduating, going from $65K to $260K (savings rate = 85%). I could retire today if I wanted, but love my work-life balance as a freelancing consultant in STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Math). I also post daily on Instagram @saverspender.

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17 Comments

  1. t
    tianna

    totally agree – plastic surgery and obsessing over wanting to look like something or someone else freaks me out. all that artificial enhancement stuff makes me feel like some women look like aliens.

    Reply
    1. save. spend. splurge.

      Especially when they’re like 50 years old and look like they’re 30. I love Shannon Tweed (Gene Simmons’ wife), but she has had way too much surgery.

      Reply
  2. L
    Lina

    I completely agree with you about Nicole Kidman. She was so pretty, now her face just looks odd. The same with Melanie Griffith and Suzanne Somers. How is that better then having a face full of wrinkles?

    Reply
    1. M
      Mochi & Macarons

      My best advice to everyone is STAY OUT OF THE SUN and wear SPF!!!!! It is the best way to avoid wrinkles 🙂

      Reply
  3. AdinaJ

    A lot of plastic surgery patients end up looking the same, so it has become its own aesthetic in a way. “Give me the Beverly-Hills-socialite-of-indeterminate-age look!”
    I think the way a lot of women treat their bodies (plastic surgery aside) is sad – they want to “fix” or “camouflage” rather than celebrate. The body just becomes another product. I’d like to think that, with age, comes the confidence to feel comfortable in your own skin, no matter what; sadly, though, it’s still difficult to be completely immune to the insidious messages out there, no matter what age you are.

    Reply
    1. M
      Mochi & Macarons

      Unfortunately, it is hard NOT to internalize that a nose has to look a certain way, or your eyes are not the right [insert change here].
      I am really seeing that in Hong Kong. Plastic surgery is just starting to take off but I can see the changes and what has been done if a women underwent surgery.

      Reply
  4. The Asian Pear

    Bruce Jenner looks like a botched up plastic surgery. it’s like Michael Jackson all over again!

    Reply
    1. M
      Mochi & Macarons

      He looked FINE before. Normal…!

      Reply
  5. D
    Debt and the Girl

    I completely agree. I am very against plastic surgery unless you were in accident or something. People are way too caught up in their looks and need to accept the fact that aging is inevitable. There are always things you can do to help slow the process but there is beauty at every age and people need to understand that.

    Reply
    1. M
      Mochi & Macarons

      A lot of it has to do with these Photoshopped ads that don’t reflect reality as well. Makes people self conscious about their skin and looks.
      Being in Hong Kong right now, these unattainable ads are EVERYWHERE and the models don’t even look Chinese, more half or white.
      How can normal Chinese girls live up to that.

      Reply
  6. M
    Mochi & Macarons

    I see your point. If it helps self esteem why not? But what I found is all the women who turn to plastic surgery and dye their hair super blonde end up looking exactly the same to me!

    Reply
  7. M
    MelD

    I didn’t have great skin and was envious of others who did. But it improved and I got used to it, people didn’t hate me for it or point… I was normally nice-looking, my teeth aren’t braced or whitened but they are pretty straight and ok. So now I think I have less trouble as I begin to age (late 40s) than someone who was either really gorgeous when they were younger or who was very anxious about their looks (one of my friends). These women seem to struggle terribly. I have also always been more or less plump, that is just my short, stocky build – why dream of snake hips when I have good, child-bearing ones?! No surgery can change that or make me tall and willowy, so I never really bothered hankering to be different. I like to wear nice clothes that fit and are appropriate, use very little make-up (why try and hide what is obvious?!) and just try to stay healthy and look ok. So many people aren’t. I think I look as old as I feel (some days that is about 18… LOL).
    I do have a mother (71) and grandmother (96) who have aged gracefully and are beautiful for their happy, laughing smiles and good nature, so I have great role models! It’s nice to see that my daughters, between 16-28, all seem to have a healthy attitude – they are not models but beautiful young women, each with specific characteristics.
    Who wants to be a mask or fashion plate?! It’s just not real.

    Reply
    1. M
      Mochi & Macarons

      I loved reading your answer. I myself am skinny but not tall (5’4″). I grew up an ugly duckling and now everything is great. Perhaps it is all due to how pretty you think you are when you were younger. It screws with your self esteem for later.

      Reply
  8. R
    Rob M

    Too many peeps are too obsessed with outer beauty rather than inner beauty (ie., strong character, intelligence, honesty, maturity, optimism, etc.). And don’t get me started on all those who are big time into weird so-called sexy tattoos. I can just imagine them all out there bouncing around on the beach when they hit 65 – ewwww! lol

    Reply
    1. M
      Mochi & Macarons

      I wanted a tattoo when I was younger but couldn’t stand the idea of pain and that it would get wrinkled 🙂 it is hot when you’re young but not past the age of 35 I think.

      Reply
  9. Vanessa

    When I was younger I wanted to fix sooo much. After I fixed my teeth though I kinda looked at myself and was like “Well. I look different but feel exactly the same so maybe I shouldn’t waste my money fixing my nose and chin”

    Reply
    1. M
      Mochi & Macarons

      I fixed my teeth with braces but have never considered plastic surgery. Just seems odd to not age gracefully.

      Reply

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