Rules of what I will and won’t wear
Inspired by Franish (LOVE HER BLOG!), here are my own rules of what I will and won’t wear.
It kind of helps cut down on even trying on things because just by looking at the garment, I know if I will or won’t wear it.
NATURAL FABRICS TO AVOID THE SWEATY PIG LOOK
By natural, I mean breathable. No polyester, please. Rayon is OK, so is Viscose, or even some poly-blends (if it’s truly amazing) will pass my fabric test, but I tend to only choose fabrics that won’t make me sweat like a pig.
NO STRAPLESS ANYTHING
Hate wearing strapless bras. I ONLY want to wear a bra with my clothes. I don’t want to go bra-less and I don’t want to wear a strapless bra.
I hate how they ride up. I also hate the look of longer shorts on me. Therefore, shorts are banned from my wardrobe unless they’re for lounging around.
ONLY V-NECK LINES
It’s the only neckline that looks good on me with my broad shoulders. Boatnecks and squarenecks are out of the question. Crewnecks still make it into my wardrobe but usually in t-shirt form.
NO CAP SLEEVE SHIRTS
Like Franish, I hate cap sleeve shirts. They make my broad shoulders look even broader.
NO LOW RISE ANYTHING
I have very slim / thin hips, and low-rise anything (contrary to popular belief) is very unflattering. It makes my flat butt look even flatter, and I hate the idea of bending down and having a plumber’s butt show, or worse, just feeling like my pants are falling off and giving me muffin top where there isn’t any.
I HATE yanking up my pants. HATE.
NO MIDRIFF-BARING ANYTHING
No one needs to see my muffin top, particularly one that has been through a pregnancy that left it scarred and stretched with PUPPPS (yes, they are STILL there and they look horrendous).
NO BAGGY-BUTT ANYTHING
Again, flat butts need help. Anything baggy in the butt has to be banished from my closet.
How am I supposed to stuff my face with food if my clothes are skintight and won’t give an inch? TELL ME THAT!
NO HEMLINES ABOVE MID-THIGH
I don’t mind wearing mini skirts as long as they aren’t TOO mini. Microminis are out of the question, but anything longer than where my fingertips hit my thighs are OK by me because I have nice, slim legs. *shrug*
NO OVERLY TRENDY ITEMS
Harem pants come to mind. I even bucked the skinny jean / pant trend for so long that it became a classic look with knee-high boots before I bought my first pair and fell in love.
When I wear my skinny pants with a blazer, I dream that I look like this Olsen twin (simple, effortless, cool):
NO THIN STRAPPED ANYTHING
I hate thin straps like spaghetti straps on tops because it makes my shoulders look very wide, and I can’t wear a bra comfortably underneath those tops without a bra strap showing (call me old fashioned but I don’t want to show my bra off, thankyouverymuch).
I like thick-strapped tops.
Exceptions: 2 dresses. I own 2 dresses with very thin straps but I love them so much, I don’t care. I just belt the hell out of them.
Hate. I hate the look except for when I am lounging around at home. I just can’t wear that stuff outside, it makes me feel so underdressed and … well, naked.
WHEN IN DOUBT, BELT IT TO GIVE ME A WAIST OF SOME SORT
When I am not sure about a dress, or a top, or what have you, I belt it. It usually ends up looking awesome because I have a serious collection of belts (obi, buckled, you name it, I got it.)
Yep, I’d agree with most of these, even though not all the same reasons!! Maybe it’s just common sense?!
Hi from France – currently spending most of my time lounging because I have the rare luxury of completely uninterrupted reading (Peter May’s 6 China thrillers – possibly a tip for you? I think they’re brilliant and am reading ravenously… also other stuff incl. a great consumer one) and the weather is perfect: sunny, warm, wind, not too hot, salty air… 😉
Lisa E. @ Lisa vs. the Loans
Strapless bras are just not an option for me, haha.
I hate cap sleeves too and I have narrow shoulders. They make any arm that is not stick thin look fat. Gotta wear shorts on Maui! I even don shorts out at night, nicer ones of course (especially like the boho styles now with lace, crochet or bloomer like bottoms). There are very few people that look good in long shorts! It’s just so frumpy, I think a dress is much more practical than long shorts. I generally don’t like skin tight dresses either but Bailey44 (Made in the USA) changed my mind on that. Jersey dresses with two layers, very body con but forgiving at the same time, it’s my go to LBD for a night out. They do have some dresses out of a thicker fabric that I don’t like but their more Grecian styles are a very soft and stretchy fabric that enhances the waist and shows zero rolls. I used to hate poly too and still do in terms of the crepe/rayon like poly sold in fast fashion retailers or affordable boutique lines. I do have a few poly dresses in more expensive luxury or contemporary lines that look and feel like silk jersey and are totally breathable in our Hawaii humidity. So I’d say not all poly is made equal.
Love this list! NO strapless! Could not agree more. If we were meant to wear strapless things, we’d have arms coming out of our waists. Wait, does that make sense? Well, regardless, I agree!
I do have one pair of knee-length, roll-up “hipster” jean shorts (jorts, if you will) that I do love because they’re the only short that does not 1) make me look 15, or 2) make me look 95. I’d say they strike a good balance and I like wearing them to picnics so I can sit cross-legged without incessant fear of the wind.
I’ve never laid down “rules” about what I will and won’t buy, but I pretty much said “Yes! Exactly!” to all the stuff that you mentioned.
In addition to that I (sadly) do not shop for skirts or dresses much because I get stressed out when it’s windy. 😛
And this is why you’re one of the most fashionable bloggers out there 😉
I have some of these rules (like no polyester!) but I’m ok with shorts and strapless. I wear dresses almost every day. I just love the one-stop-shop of a dress and how easy it is to wear it to work then out for drinks after.
I couldn’t make my butt look flat if I tried so no rules there hahaha
I LOVE Franish! Her site is so awesome… I check it daily even though there isn’t a daily post 🙂
I’m pretty much on board with most of your rules. I have “linebacker” shoulders (thanks to my brother for naming them that… how sweet he is!) so no straps or halters etc otherwise I look even more like a football player.
No empire waists.
No strapless anything.
No floaty/unstructured tops.
No heels (except for dressy occasions, which I already have a couple pairs for).
I feel the same on ALMOST all of these. I do have two pairs of shorts that aren’t too short, and I’ve been known to wear sweats in public :). Everything else, I 100% agree!
I love this list, and I agree with all that you’ve mentioned however I’m a bit dicey about a few things. For example, I’ll wear thin straps even though I have broad man shoulders, but I make sure I wear a cardigan or tiny shrug along with it.
I wish I could stop wearing strapless bards, but most of my dresses or even blouses require them and that’s so annoying!
P.S : I love you for mentioning the shorts. Same goes with m, and I’ve been called out by my family and friends for thinking funny, glad to see I’m not alone!