Eemusings’ post on what would you pay to change about yourself was not only original but .. kind of fun to think about!
Aside from some personality traits (I have a few bad ones, obviously)… I’m going to focus just on the physical.
What would I change about my body and how much would I pay?
1. GET 20/20 VISION WITHOUT ANY SURGERY – $20,000
I know Lasik exists, but I also know people who have gone through it and had to have it redone and/or permanently scarred their eyes for life.
I am too scared to do this, and to ever think about doing surgery on my eyes that involves cutting my eyeball open, and this is something that will never, ever happen for me.
I’d rather stick to wearing contacts and eyeglasses than to risk this.
(Best X-Ray I could find, even if it isn’t of a knee)
2. FIX MY AWKWARD BUM KNEE – $20,000
I have a crooked knee that no one notices except for myself, and more often when I walk for too long and it starts to hurt.
I am suspicious when my mother wistfully looks at me after I recount the proper way to swaddle a baby that I saw on Youtube and says:
I didn’t even know how to swaddle a baby when I had you kids. I didn’t know you needed to bend the elbows of the baby’s arms or leave room for the legs to kick…
O_o
Er.. thanks Mom?
Anyway, this knee is only a problem on occasion as it doesn’t align up correctly and puts the weight of my body at an awkward angle on my joints. The only way I can combat this is to not get too heavy so that the weight is minimal.
I thought about getting it fixed but really what can they do? The bone is permanently fused in an awkward angle and it would mean breaking my knee re-aligning it and perhaps causing MORE problems than it is worth.
I just live with it.
3. GET RID OF MY ECZEMA PERMANENTLY (INCLUDING ANY SCARS FROM IT) – $20,000
Again, I could go through laser surgery to remove these scars and marks, but my eczema would still persist.
I will say that it has gotten better since I learned over the past decade or so how to:
- Take warm but not hot showers
- Moisturize like a mofo immediately when my skin is still damp
- Use a natural moisturizer like shea butter that is very thick, sticky but effective
- Not to irritate / scrub my skin with loofahs, sponges or exfoliate too often or at all
- Keep my legs shaved, because any little rustle of wind on leg hair makes me itch absentmindedly
- Avoid scratching my skin at all costs, because even a little nick can cause a rash to develop
It’s just annoying because I also have to be careful when I cut myself because any little cut has a potential of eczema to develop into a full-blown, nasty case.


