??:?? — Tired. So tired. I need another hour but Little Bun is up and full of energy.
5:26 a.m. — I go and make my tea, and have some quiet time before the Little Storm hits.
5:37 a.m. — He runs out crying, and screaming, banging on the door, saying: I don’t want Mommy to leave when it is dark and I am still asleep! I want Mommy to stay in the blankets!!! It takes 15 minutes of hugging and soothing to calm him down.
6:02 a.m. — OMG. My appointment is NOT today, it is TOMORROW. FML. I had not planned to go to work today, now I need to prep my lunch, etc, so I start doing that.
6:40 a.m. — My partner is still in bed, so I start prepping Little Bun’s lunch too, for daycare. I am cutting up fruit, scooping out his lunch, refilling his bottle….
6:53 a.m. — I try and wrangle this child into clothes and he fights me – he doesn’t want to go. WHY. DAYCARE IS SO MUCH FUN. You get to play with toys and practice letters and sing.. I mean, I don’t even understand how this is different from playgroup, to be honest, except that they are gouging me $50 a day for this service instead of it being free.
6:55 a.m. — My partner comes out of the bedroom and tells me that he isn’t going to daycare all week, he is staying at home because his school has a break. O_o .. I recall him telling me this, but I forgot to note it down and I am trying to juggle so many schedules in my head – (1) personal (2) work (3) Little Bun, (4) blog, and now my partner’s too? We end up having a mini spat, with him saying to me that I SHOULD have written it down and he wouldn’t have forgotten to get up to make Little Bun’s kit for daycare. I am yelling back that I was up at 5-ish a.m. with him, I am TIRED, I have so much going on in my head, and I can’t make a mistake? I have to be perfect all the time? <— totally screaming this. I even scream that I was trying to do his daycare packed lunch and snacks because I thought I was being NICE and letting him sleep in while I got things ready. I MEAN WHAT THE #%*($@!!!!!
8:02 a.m. — At work, still highly annoyed and bristling.
8:34 a.m. — I work on my notes…. and all my documents are gone from last week. I guess I saved them all to the wrong folder, to a drive instead of on the laptop or whatever? FML. I sigh, and go make a tea. I cannot handle this right now.
9:05 a.m. — I head into the first meeting of the week. I tell my lead that my appointment is tomorrow not today. She doesn’t care. This project is SO CHILL for remote work, I am loving this. You don’t have to justify to anyone, anything.
9:50 a.m. — Meeting over, I head into my next one.
10:38 a.m. — Meeting over, I am hungry, but waiting until an appropriate lunch hour to eat. I have this room booked for an extra hour so I am going to sit here in silence and work, instead of sitting in a massive, loud, crazy, wild room with lots of people talking.
11:30 a.m. — Lunch. Oh this look is cute, I need a red maxi dress… Or I could use my maxi skirt, and a red top, and recreate this look for free out of my closet. <– $0 sounds better.
1:00 p.m. — Meeting. This drags on. This could have been a bloody email. Seriously.
2:30 p.m. — I head home early. Really, I just want to get sushi as a treat for the morning and week start I have had so far – honestly, this is not a good start. I am so tired, and I want to take a break in the lobby, alone, without Little Bun.
3:15 p.m. — I have sushi and it is everything I ever dreamed of. It is funny how this can just make your day. It just makes it so much better, and you feel great afterwards. $14.95
3:21 p.m. — I post this graphic (deadly accurate by the way) and get these responses:
FYI — Discarded Garbage = Anything your child won’t eat and you can’t bear to waste. :-\
3:47 p.m. — I log in at the lobby of my building as I get an urgent email just as I come home about some questions for the client. I fire up the laptop and work.
4:13 p.m. — Ugh.. the home still smells of that filler. My headache gets worse, and I am nauseous now. I am so sensitive to smells..
2:30 p.m. — I can’t even eat, I drink some cashew smoothie, and then go play with Little Bun, doing Teddy Math Journey (addition, then subtraction, then division)… where we basically hop his Teddy across the bed, and he only makes it if he answers correctly, otherwise he moves backwards. He LOVES this game.
8:11 p.m. — I am unable to really stay awake. I am so exhausted, nauseous from the fumes, sleep-deprived.. I half doze off while he is watching videos.
8:21 p.m. — Time for bed. I know it is early but he can stay up with Daddy and play blocks or sleep with Mommy. He chooses me.
9:00 p.m. — He wants to go to the bathroom just as my partner gets into bed. I am so nauseous with a headache, I get my partner to do it.
9:13 p.m. — “Ehhhhh!!…” …. “What? Don’t whine at me.” ….. “I want a MOMMY NOOK!!“…. so I pull his pillow close to my side, and tuck him in beside me.
??:?? — Little Bun wakes me up by crawling close to me and whimpering. He kicked off his blankets again, and now is freezing cold. Eye roll. I pull him close to my warm body and blankets, wrap him in his blanket, and throw my pre-warmed blanket over him, now shivering, myself, to warm him up. He completely relaxes in my arms, and goes right back to sleep, deep breathing, his hair tickling my chin and neck.
??:?? — I’m awake now, a little cold, in an awkward position with the weight of a sack of potatoes on my arm and elbow, and my other arm hugging him tight. I am tired but I really really cherish this moment. I will not have many of these left where he will let me cuddle him like this. I just lie there and smell him.
??:?? — Tired. Really tired. Nauseous still. He rolled off me and is awake, my left arm is tingling from the blood rushing back.
5:26 a.m. — Grabbing his milk, I make some tea, and go through my To Do list for the day.
6:43 a.m. — Little Bun finishes his pasta with cheese (NOT MIXED. NEVER MIXED.), and I set up him with videos to keep him quiet while his father sleeps. I log in to banking accounts, check to make sure I paid/didn’t miss bills, what is upcoming, and investigate this Shwap Club my friend sent me via IG for clothing exchange.
7:03 a.m. — Meltdown. EPIC MELTDOWN. He apparently hurt himself on some blocks while trying to help Daddy clean up and then loses his #$#&@.. I have to step in and hold him for 20 minutes to calm him down and wipe his tears.
8:08 a.m. — I play with sniffling, red-faced Little Bun at his newly concocted “most and least” game which he had to teach me to say things like: How many more red pots are there than brown pots? … and he has to answer them, and then we have to decide if we can divide into it. So he tells me 3 brown pots, 12 red pots, and then how many times does 3 go into 12? Answer: 4. HE MADE THIS GAME UP. I DID NOT HAVE ANY PART IN THIS. I just have to play along and be on my math game…. O_o
9:11 a.m. — I get ready and head off to my doctor’s appointment. I am parked, in my car on my phone answering messages, and some obnoxious guy in a Porsche is staring at me with dagger eyes, like he is expecting me to drive off and give him his spot. He can’t believe I am just sitting there, not moving while he is clearly waiting for the spot. NO SIR. I am waiting in my car until 9:25 a.m. so I don’t have to pay more parking than I have to. I AM THAT CHEAP. I get so annoyed by his accusing eyes, that I park and walk to the meter to pay an extra $0.25 because I don’t have a sunshade to block these idiots out yet. I should get one.
10:15 a.m. — At my appointment, she tells me I am long overdue for a PAP smear. So.. hey, no need for another appointment, I hop up and she does one and tells me she wants me to see a specialist just to be sure what I have is benign. WHAT?… Now I am troubled. She at least refills all my ‘scrips so I no longer need to make another appointment to come in to refill my birth control. YAY for universal healthcare!!!!!
10:58 a.m. — I fill the prescriptions I need, and am reminded of a parenting hack I used to have with Little Bun was a Baby Bun. $33.85
I used to let him carry around a toy (any toy, he could pick whoever) to play with while we were there, but they had to/wanted to go back to their Mommy and Daddy before we left the store, and we’d place them back, and wave goodbye until the next time.
Oh and this, even tissues have motivational quotes now, sure they cost TWICE THE PRICE of the generic no name brands, but … you can feel like you can Find your Fearless every time you use one.
11:30 a.m. — I have a sushi lunch but am disappointed, whoever is behind the counter today is stingy AF with the fish and she sliced it so thin you can see through it. $15.15
11:59 a.m. — Home, Little Bun rushes to me, and has a little piece of red thread, and proceeds to pretend to tickle me with it, and I have to laugh (obviously!) … with an over the top “hee hee hee!” If this isn’t the time that you can’t play with kids like this and be silly, I don’t know when a good time is. They are at such a great age before they become moody tweens who hate you. I hope mine skips this phase. I hear it doesn’t affect all of them.
12:11 p.m. — I log in and review an agreement with a provider for the company and am shocked at how expensive everything is. WOW. They charge you through the NOSE. Holy…. These people are charging $200/hour for what I could do for them, and they’re kvetching at my rate? I am a STEAL at this price.
12:17 p.m. — To keep Little Bun quiet, I give him a medicine package (without the medicine in it of course), and he runs off like a squirrel to quietly rip up the manual, the pages, the box, and the stickers on the box to put it in recycling. Works like a charm.
1:10 p.m. — Time for his nap. I escape to run errands and open a new bank account with ScotiaBank to get their $350 bonus. You need a minimum balance of $5000 in the account or else you pay a $30 (!!) monthly fee, to pay 1 bill for $50, and have two Pre-Authorized debits for $50 going to a bill. It costs $20 to close an account and you need it open for 3-ish months to get the bonus. All of this works out to still earning $300 net, which is worth the hassle.
1:23 p.m. — She gives me the side eye. I think when I started calculating the interest rates on the bank account in my head, she got the gist of my situation and knows I’m going to bounce after I get my money.
2:00 p.m. — I drop by for a polenta, stuffed mushrooms and cheesecake. I DESERVE TO EAT MY EMOTIONS. $20.50
4:56 p.m. — My partner and I are chatting about the weekend. His friend has a birthday, I also have plans coming up in 2 weeks with a friend coming to visit so I’ll have to deep clean.
5:13 p.m. — I quickly poll on Instagram and realize I am in the MINORITY of people who do not pay for a cleaner. I guess I don’t see cleaning as a huge chore, AND I hate that argument of “If I can pay X amount of money and make more money per hour instead, I should outsource all my tasks“… because that just creates this side hustle mentality I hate, and even if I wanted to, I couldn’t work more instead of paying someone to clean my place. I am set at 40 hours a week, no overtime. Plus, I just tidy as I go, we are pretty clean as a family and keep things wiped, and dishes washed…Even Little Bun who is truly a fastidious little child. A little dust doesn’t bother me either – I’ll get to it next week. Or the week after. Or when I start giving the dust bunnies nicknames.
I also think a few things:
1. Men have a higher tolerance for filth. They just don’t see that the front hallway needs to be swept, THEN cleaned… they just tidy it up and call it a day. So women get frustrated and end up doing it, then are resentful they had to do it, and the guys are all clueless like — BUT I CLEANED the hallway! …. Uhh no you didn’t. Women just quietly take on that emotional labour and seethe in anger. So, they get cleaners instead because they’re so angry at their spouse being a lazy SOB (not true in all cases, my partner is very clean, it is why I think Little Bun got it from his father not from me…)
2. We have a small place. 1200 square feet is a decent size but not massive. I don’t need a cleaner. In the time my Dyson V7 Animal vacuum goes from 100% to zero, I have done the entire apartment (about 20 minutes). We also don’t have much furniture (see my home here – Sherry’s Home), or many big things I have to move, or tidy. We also don’t have decorative knicknacks.
3. My partner helps out a lot. He deep cleans the oven, shower, fridge (and behind the fridge and stove), radiators and air vents at least once a year. I would gladly pay for these tasks because I really don’t want to do them. But I am okay with light cleaning, vacuuming etc. He also dusts, and vacuums when he sees it is dirty. We sort of just do it haphazardly.
7:40 p.m. — My partner and I chat about this very subject, and he came to the same conclusions too — men definitely don’t want to do the work because if they do, they’re on the hook for it forever, AND if they don’t do it… you will. So why bother trying?
8:03 p.m. — Books, we pull out 6 from the bookshelf and snuggle down.
8:45 p.m. — We play games after books, and then bedtime.
??:?? — Screaming. I get his milk. I think he is sick, but this does not make it easier on me.
5:00 a.m. — He is such an angry dinosaur right now. I am talking major tears, waterworks, screaming at the TOP OF HIS LUNGS. I am DYING. I spend time trying to calm him down. I have to leave early to try and avoid the line for my blood test, and I am not having this be my mental image as I walk out the door because it will RUIN MY MORNING.
5:30 a.m. — I am carrying and soothing him, just like when he was a baby. But he is now 50 pounds and my arms are getting a workout.
5:47 a.m. — I reheat my now cold tea while he plays with a flashlight in the bookcase, running it up and down like a train, making whooshing noises.
7:59 a.m. — At the clinic now. I escaped with very little issues because I told him I needed bloodwork to check if I was sick (all true).
10:15 a.m. — Home.
12:08 p.m. — My partner and I are chatting about a birthday this weekend he is cooking for, making this creamy vinegar sauce over chicken, with potato gratin and a cake. Little Bun thunderstomps out of the bedroom. Surprised, I turn to him and say — Are you hungry baby? Do you want soup? A banana? ….. and he looks at me and says very VERY cutely and sweetly: “But I thought I heard Mommy talking about CHICKEN…..“… and I laugh and tell him it is for Saturday. He grins and runs back to the bedroom.
1:30 p.m. — I go to return a micro SD card that doesn’t work for my dashcam and am HORRIFIED I left it at home / lost it at home!? THAT THING IS EIGHTY BUCKS. HOW DUMB AM I…
2:15 p.m. — I rush back home, find it (RELIEVED) in a box I put all that stuff in, and rush back to the store. See this right here? Almost lost $80 just by being a dumbass and not putting it in a baggie…
2:47 p.m. — I argue with the girl behind the counter that she HAS to take it back, they SOLD it to me as a dashcam card and it is not. WTF. Most people would have given up after she said “No returns”, but this is $80 and I am sufficiently confident enough that she WILL take it back because I’m an annoyed customer who is not spineless. I wear her down. She says “JUST THIS ONCE”.. but I am never buying from them again so whatever. At least I got my money back. Don’t make me angry, I’ll just only shop on Amazon as a result.
3:50 p.m. — Home. I come in and Little Bun JUST woke up. I go to look at him but he gives me death eyes. I back out slowly, fearing the anger of His Bunness.
3:49 p.m. — He falls back asleep, coughing. Poor baby. Poor MOMMY!
4:26 p.m. — He wakes up again. I go and snuggle him, and then we read books together, and play Teddy Math Journey (this time with division…)
5:11 p.m. — I make a quick dinner, and then tidy up my desk area.
7:48 p.m. — Time for looking at my assets and planning my day. I go through my list, and do all of the things on there:
- Cut nails – Little Bun’s and mine
- Check the return receipts to make sure the money posted back to my credit card so I can shred the receipt
- Check on my bank account balances
- Make sure my cards paid on time – I do it automatically but I always double check
- Make notes and set up direct deposit for my new $350 bonus chequing account so I meet the minimums and get that money ASAP
8:23 p.m. — Time for bed. My partner is redoing some silicone for weather proofing and the apartment STINKS. Ugh. I’m nauseous again.
??:?? — I wake up to the sweet sounds of screaming. Yep. He is awake and he is grumpy because he lost his sock ball. He made a ball out of two socks, which I had initially played off as a baby birds nest, but now he has turned it into a ball and we throw it back and forth in the bedroom together. He also, now sleeps with that sock ball and 3 stuffed animals, and gets very prickly if he loses them in the middle of the night.
??:?? — Yeah he’s awake.
5:46 a.m. — There’s no milk so I plan on a Starbucks treat and pack my reusable mug. <3
5:59 a.m. — He watches videos quietly.. and then the f#&$*ing happens. He drops this book he was playing with (I KNOW. A BOOK), and it smashes to the floor making a very loud noise, which then triggers him, and he starts screaming and crying. I am… I am trying to keep him calm, carry him, he is not having it. He is just losing it.
6:24 a.m. — I finally get him calmed down, and I tell him I have to start getting ready in a bit – does he want more videos or to do Mommy talks/cuddles? He chooses Mommy cuddling, and then goes back to the videos so I can get ready.
6:49 a.m. — He is whining as I am getting ready, he wants me to stay at home. My partner comes out of the bedroom, and tells him if he behaves, they’ll go out on a little outing together. Little Bun perks up. He tells me that since I am not walking to work (LOL!), he has to take Daddy’s car to go out. He can’t take my car. O_o… Where did he.. No. The car is ALWAYS Mommy’s car, I tell him. He insists that he would take my car if I was walking or taking the bus, and I finally just give in. He isn’t wrong, they would use my car if I wasn’t using it.
7:03 a.m. — Out the door, on the way to Starbucks! I get there, order my Tall Chai, and feel like a BOSS today. Love my dress and my chain, my hair is Dyson-curled-perfection, and I am feelin’ like a million bucks. $5.11
8:01 a.m. — FML. Little Bun played with my lid and left it open, so when I went to go put it in my bag to hold it while I swiped my badge, it spilled out. I quickly grab a wet wipe and clean my bag the best I can, at least only a bit spilled, not a lot.
8:30 a.m. — At work, I am non-stop working. So much. SO MUCH. People are now asking why I am doing this, and that.. and I am realizing they sort of don’t know what they are doing, and are nervous I’ll jeopardize their processes. Don’t worry, I don’t give AF so I am not planning on helping you do anything the right way if you don’t want my advice.
9:08 a.m. — Team meeting. People don’t ever respect meeting end times – people have ROOMS BOOKED, GET OUT.
12:15 p.m. — Another team meeting. This Mansplainer forgot he even accepted my meeting and went out to lunch. I SAW YOU WITH YOUR JACKET ON, LEAVING. You forgot, and now we push it to next week. Fine by me, I am going to chill until our meeting because you’re literally blocking me from working.
12:28 p.m. — I go out for a very special sushi treat instead. $40.45
2:10 p.m. — Back at the office, I brush my teeth, check my emails, answer a few calls, and then off to my other meeting. After this is done, TIME TO GO HOME.
4:19 p.m. — Meeting over, I AM OUT! Someone messages me, I tell her to call me any time, I’ll take the call in the car as I drive home, no problem. I get to the bank to run an errand and she messages back it is okay, she’ll postpone it to next week.
4:40 p.m. — I withdraw $1800 and walk to the bank next door and deposit it into my account to cover my bills for the next while. Not only is this FREE (physical withdrawal and deposit), it also is so easy – the banks are beside each other. I’d rather do this than pay the $2 money transfer fee. I AM that cheap.
4:57 p.m. — I drop by the pharmacy, and pick up some tissue paper for the office. I am always hunting for it especially during winter, and I want to keep a roll in my bag because this is a flex work space and I HAVE NO OFFICE TO KEEP THIS TISSUE BOX IN. Grr… still mad. But also not angry because this means I can be remote any time I want, any day I want…. <3 $3.67
5:30 p.m. — Home. I pick up 5 packages downstairs, one is Little Bun’s new Inside Maths book (the other one got ruined), and my partner’s new books arrived, along with my vitamin supplements. I have been following Dr. Mark Hyman for a while now, and he is not wrong in this post he writes about whether or not you need supplements.
He makes some great points, and while I try to eat very diversified foods, I also know I don’t feel well and I wonder if it is due to my body not having enough vitamins. I know they can help, even if 90% of it gets flushed out of the body, 10% for me, would be worthwhile.
I purchased, for your information, from these 3 brands only, because the over the counter vitamins are pretty much the lowest you can get.
If you want good nutritional supplements you need to buy the high quality stuff: Thorne Research, Pure Encapsulations, and Metagenics.
The three vitamins you should consider from any of these brands are: D3, Omega 3 with EPA and DHA and a multi-vitamin. In case you’re interested, here are each in each brand, and I’d suggest doing the math / cost per pill to see out of the 3 which ones are the cheapest.
6:17 p.m. — I set Little Bun up with videos, he is coughing and feeling sick, and it’s all he wants.
6:49 p.m. — I log in and do banking transactions, update my budget, etc.
7:22 p.m. — We talk about lazy husbands (LOL .. my partner and I are on the same page regarding this), and Little Bun is giggling in the bedroom by himself, watching videos.
8:11 p.m. — Time for bed.
??:?? — For sure it is too early to be up but my body is up. WTF.
5:05 a.m. — He starts the morning, and I tell him – Do not begin by whining. I cannot handle this right now... and he responds back: I AM NOT WHINING. … Uh. YOU ARE. You TOTALLY ARE.
5:40 a.m. — He falls back asleep after some milk, then gets back up and terrorizes me. I can’t even have tea, there is no milk. OMG…
5:59 a.m. — I am holding him in my arms, then I feed him pasta, and I have such a terrible headache from lack of sleep, no caffeine, tired…
6:34 a.m. — He watches videos quietly, but then gets antsy, and I start showing him things outside and naming trees, grass, etc. He is coughing, and he is sick, but so am I (a little) and my partner too. We are all on the edge right now.
7:08 a.m. — I log in.
7:45 a.m. — At least my Instagram is close to 3000 followers. I have been working pretty hard since the summer to get the number up, but didn’t hit a groove until a few months ago. Not that I care so much about followers, but 10K gets you the option to let you swipe up to read posts without having to click on a link (game changer), and that is the main reason for Instagram, to drive people to the blog to read more content. Instagram has some extra content, but my main place where I rant my heart out is here.
8:38 a.m. — I am very grumpy right now and snap at my partner if he is going out or not. If he isn’t, I am leaving. He is going out he says (and has been saying for 2 hours). THEN GO. GET OUT. …. I cannot handle so many people around me, I am right now in an introverted phase and I don’t want conversation, I don’t even want to be near people, I just want to lie down and veg in peace. But I can’t because I am working.
9:15 a.m. — Someone emails me in a “thou shalt not” sort of tone in an email, telling me off, and I give it right back to him. I didn’t do things without asking permission to edit documents, AND I am the lead. So you better tell me why I can’t, as the lead, handle my own work and redo something if need be. At the end: “What’s the issue?” … I don’t apologize, I don’t rub it in, I just state facts and say “Great, just wanted to be clear who is in control of what. Thanks for following up.“…. meaning… do not tell me how to do my job. If you want to tell me how to do my job, DO MY JOB THEN.
9:26 a.m. — He backtracked. Good. If you come for me, you better come correct in an email telling me off. You don’t know me. Try the carrot, not the stick or you’re going to get the stick right back at you.
10:39 a.m. — I make and eat some noodles. Maybe it will help my grumpiness. Maybe I am just hangry.
11:00 a.m. — I dial into a call. I ask a lot of questions and probably seem like I am quizzing or testing them, but I truly don’t know what all of their acronyms are.
12:08 p.m. — I continue working. I want to end early today.
1:03 p.m. — Little Bun naps.
4:15 p.m. — Day over, Little Bun is up from his nap. He is still feeling sick, poor baby. He is coughing hard, like I am. I can hear the fluid in his chest.
5:08 p.m. — I head out quickly to return a microSD card and get to the store only to realize it fell out of the package somewhere! I drive home in a PANIC hoping I find it, and I do, thankfully, in a shoe. OMG. OMG OMG. I hyperventilate. It was a $100 card. How dumb could I be?
5:50 p.m. — Back to the store a second time, I finally return it. -$115.00
7:56 p.m. — I don’t even know what happened from then until now – playing catch with a sock ball (our new favourite thing), reading books, and taking a shower most likely. Time for bed.
??:?? — Little Bun wakes me up with: Mommy.. there will be CAKE TODAY! What..? Oh right. Birthday.
6:00 a.m. — He dances around the living room eying the cake my partner made yesterday. He reminds Little Bun it is for NIGHT TIME, not for morning breakfast. Little Bun’s face falls. He turns and “translates” for me — “Mommy, it is for night time. It is a night cake.”
7:59 a.m. — My partner heads out to buy the food for the lunch he is making for his friends’ birthday.
7:59 a.m. — I prep this quote for Instagram which I think is basically my whole reason for why I save money.
12:26 p.m. — Home, my partner starts cooking and I head out quickly to the post office to mail a Poshmark sale (YAY!), and I run a few errands.
4:05 p.m. — Home, my partner is slightly annoyed (I can tell), because I am home later than normal, because he is cooking and handling Little Bun, which makes him a little tetchy. Also, it is because as he later explained, he didn’t plan the meal right – he started an hour too late and was panicking around 5 when his friends were supposed to show up.
6:07 p.m. — Friends are here. Little Bun runs out squealing and shakes hands, and gives kisses like I asked him to.
7:21 p.m. — Lots of chatting into the night. I am shooting daggers at my partner because HE SHOULD BE SERVING FOOD BY NOW. I am so hungry. Little Bun is eating, and I am basically eating off his plate, I am starving. GET TO IT. STOP TALKING. SERVE FOOD.
8:00 p.m. — We are all so ravenous, we devour our plates like animals.
9:27 p.m. — We finally get our meals, and Little Bun finally gets his cake at the end. He was running back and forth between watching videos and checking to see when the cake would be ready to eat.
10:21 p.m. — Little Bun is so overtired right now. He crawls into bed after watching videos and gives a tired wail… I quickly rush to him, tuck him in, kiss him and tell him I’ll be in soon. He can’t wait for us any longer.
11:49 p.m. — I subtly, not subtly hint to the girlfriend that we normally sleep at 8, so we are all exhausted, as Little Bun will likely wake up at 5 a.m. tomorrow and crush my spirits and my will to live. She gets the hint and tries to move things along to get home because I am clearly TIRED AF. I am not meant for late nights any more but I don’t want to be rude …. but I AM TIRED.
12:10 a.m. — They leave, and I tell my partner that next time, he has to serve earlier. We were ALL STARVING. I don’t know what’s up with this protocol of making people wait when the food is ready to eat, because this is BS. I’d rather eat, THEN drink or chat into the night instead of making us wait and wait and wait. Plus, our bedtime is normally 8, so I am dying by then. I am so annoyed.
12:25 a.m. — Bedtime. I’ll do dishes tomorrow.
??:?? — Yeah I knew it. I am very very tired.
6:21 a.m. — Little Bun is tired. I am tired. I manage to handle him for the morning because my energy is so low that everything we do is fine, and my brain is not overthinking about everything else I have to get done. I am feeling so incredibly sick right now, fatigued, and I have had no sleep.
9:15 a.m. — My partner “wakes up”, he drank a lot last night and it was his friends’ birthday and party, so I don’t mind taking the brunt of the morning – I always do anyway, Little Bun doesn’t want anyone else.
9:20 a.m. — Now that he is awake, I go into the bedroom with the laptop full of Tom and Jerry videos, and set Little Bun up. I half sleep on and off the whole morning, mumbling to Little Bun – 30 more minutes… 45 more minutes.. 10 more minutes…
10:45 a.m. — Little Bun is SO SWEET, he has been watching videos and the clock, and when it is time (after when I say half an hour more, or 1 minutes more), he taps me on my chest and says: Mommy? Mommy? I am trying to wake up Mommy….. I know I cannot oversleep or over nap or my night sleep is done, so I force myself up after my little human snooze button taps me on my chest again at the 10 minute mark. He has also interrupted my naps 3 times which in hindsight is a good thing so I don’t oversleep, but the last time he interrupted me, I was so annoyed because I was JUST about to REM sleep (I could feel it) and he woke me up again to go to the bathroom. I try not get angry as it is definitely not his fault but I am so tired and sick.
11:58 a.m. — Little Bun runs back and forth to the kitchen, checking for when lunch is ready and when he is, he goes and pats me on my shoulder – Mommy, it’s time for lunch, come and eat!… We eat hardboiled eggs, fresh homemade bread and a salad with avocado. I can’t even eat most of it, I am so full from yesterday but also feeling sick. I do feel much better though from my on and off napping.
12:20 p.m. — I eat lunch, and then go to mindlessly watch videos.
2:58 p.m. — Little Bun is up, I do dishes mindlessly. I am moving like molasses today.
3:26 p.m. — I start laundry, dry it, put it away. Start another load, dry and put it away. I also pick out my outfits for the next week with Little Bun choosing certain things – I give him a choice: A or B?… because I will wear either option but I like giving him a choice so he feels empowered in decision-making and doesn’t learn to just accept everything. Something I picked up in a parenting book – giving kids a choice, so they feel a sense of power. Not TOO much power though, because… no. I am still their parent.
9:26 p.m. — I don’t even know what happened between laundry and bedtime. I am sure we played catch a lot (again – it is two socks made into a ball, called a ‘ball’ or a ‘sock ball’, and the game is just to throw it back and forth – he LOVES it, and I love playing with him.)
Want more? Read all of my previous Week of Money Diaries.