Ask Sherry: Shoe Care and what I pay my cobbler for
You asked, and I am answering every Friday once I have enough questions!
You can ask any question using the form here or entering a comment in a form on my blog sidebar.
Update: How much do you weigh?
I finally got myself weighed today by a professional.
I’m 123.5 lbs. I knew I was around the ballpark of 120 – 130lbs…
Please remember to do a post on your scarf organizing system. You said in a recent post that you would write about that. Thank you!
YES! Making a note. Will not forget. 🙂
( First though, I need to fix this stupid blog techie problem I am having…. (sorry). )
Got a lot of things on the go, but will add this along with other requests:
- Closet post
- Baby Bun’s toys & things
- How we store linens & toiletries
Would you be able to share your thought process on deciding whether to have a second child? We have one, and I am inclined to stop at one, and yet almost everyone tells me I will regret it. Thoughts?
This one is really tough. I have to tell you I am still not 100% certain, but sometimes you just have to bite the bullet and choose your choice.
So my partner, was adamant at Baby Bun’s 18th month that we do not have another child when I broached the subject of how to plan for my second maternity leave.
I guess all the sleepless nights, the cost of raising a child (Baby Tracker here, and the costs of raising Baby Bun until the age of 3 here), and the general stress that one child brings upon a family (we fought a lot, and still sometimes do although he has leaned up on this), made him certain he did not want to do this again.
I myself, was sure I would have at least 2 children, if not 4. I had dreamed my whole life of a large family where the siblings loved each other and were close, unlike my siblings and I.
I guess that’s what made my realize the folly in my assumptions — that my children would grow up together, love each other deeply and be the kind of Brady Bunch family I had envisioned – realizing that I don’t even have THAT with my siblings, and there is more than one of us.
Then I polled a bunch of readers asking: Are Only Children Lonely? because I really wanted to be sure I wasn’t going to ruin Baby Bun’s life.
I want him to feel like he got everything and more out of us as parents, and to not feel like he was deprived in any way, and this choice that we are making for our lives, affects him as well, especially as he ages and we age along with him.
I also thought a lot about what I wanted. Yes, I wanted more than one child, but did I really? I felt as though maybe just Baby Bun would be enough. He is already a lot of work for me (and he is a LOW MAINTENANCE TODDLER), and him as a newborn and baby was very hard on my mental state, and it is still hard now, all those sleep deprived nights wreaking havoc on my health and sanity, not to mention the physical side, and lastly, economic side of it all.
I just can’t predict or know the future, and know whether or not my second child would be more or less work than Baby Bun now (all signs point to the second one being worse based on how “lucky” we have gotten with him in many ways), and whether or not I would be happier or not.
The only thing that would have really changed the dynamic in all of this is if I lived closer to family. That family network of having grandparents, aunts and uncles to call on for support is immeasurable, not to mention free as we wouldn’t have to pay for daycare either which would help the costs.
As we live a good 8 hours away by car from any of our family members, it isolates us, and makes it doubly hard. I have no one I can trust in my heart to call on to take care of Baby Bun when I need them do and yes I can pay for daycare, etc, but it is not the same when you need them to watch a child for a few hours before you rush out.
I love my life now, and I have heard from MANY PARENTS that adding a second child is harder than just having one child.. but after that, three or more children is easy breezy, relatively speaking.
I am not sure I can go through the stress of breastfeeding, latching, diapers, constant whining, crying, potty training, all while trying to work full-time to pay my half and take care of a toddler and manage those fights.
Is it worth it for me to try and add another life into the dynamic? The balance I have achieved now with my partner and Baby Bun is for me, quite perfect. Things are good now, and it took three long slogged years to get here because we were first-time parents trying to re-define our relationship after having a child with the division of labour and so on which I wrote about here when a reader asked how I split my time with taking care of Baby Bun.
Ultimately, there is no guarantee that whatever we choose will be the right choice. Only child – could be a bum deal or a great thing, and many children – could be a bum deal or a fantastic thing.
Also, we both have to be on board. He is not, and I respect that as well.
Can you do a post on shoe care – how you clean, protect and store your shoes? Also, can you talk about what kind of care you perform at home vs. services you ask for at the cobbler? Thanks!
Sure. I will add it to the list. 🙂
- Closet & shoes
- Baby Bun’s toys & things
- How we store linens & toiletries
- Scarf organization
Who are you and what is your career?
Why do you have that “Stay/Leave” java script turned on your site? Seems to be a recent change? Sorry, but it’s very annoying and I had to block it. Is it supposed to help your web traffic or stats? What’s the point of it?
*gasp* I have no idea what the heck that is.
I am mortified and very VERY sorry. I don’t know how to get rid of it.. thus far, have been racking my brain since I got this to try and remove it (and broke the blog in the process on Wednesday).
I am working on fixing it, I promise.
I did not do this on purpose.
It doesn’t do anything but annoy me (and you).
UPDATE: It was my Google Forms widget in the sidebar.
I have de-activated the form temporarily until I can find a solution because my blog is also not working with some other technical issues.
Should be okay now. THANK YOU!