Morning Routines of Successful People: The Toddler Edition
Read this article Morning Routines of Successful People then come back here, ‘cuz I think I have the perfect routine down.
My day is exactly like theirs.
POINT #1: WAKE UP SUPER EARLY
I am TOTALLY up super early.
I am up so early, the sun is still saying: “WTF it’s night time still”…. because Baby Bun is up at 4 a.m., he usually wants his 12 oz bottle of milk and is not afraid to squeal for it while slapping my face.
POINT #2: EXERCISE
I run every morning.
I mostly do the Poo Run which is running after Baby Bun begging him to get his diaper changed because he just pooed. He likes to run away, squeal and hide when I tell him: “Diaper change.”
Or I do the Pots & Pans Squat where I have to carry him up to touch pots and pans in the cupboard.
The last exercise I do is the Chair Lift where he needs to be hoisted up and down off my lap or in and out of his baby chair.
By far, my most strenuous exercise routine in the morning is called Mommy Horse, the game he loves where he basically climbs on my back, holds on to my shoulders, belly bumps* me, then directs me around by tugging on my ponytail, squealing his commands.
We also play Mommy Horse the Lazy Edition, where I am exhausted, lying on my back, and he climbs on top of my stomach and bounces up and down, squealing as though he’s in a rodeo.
*Belly Bumping is when he shoves his belly hard against me multiple times in an effort to get me to do what he wants — carry him, play with him, get his water for him, give him a toy…
Sometimes he backs up and Bum Bumps my face.
POINT #3: TALK WITH THEIR FAMILY OR FRIENDS
I do this ALL THE TIME.
Baby Bun now babbles to me, and I have to pretend to answer back to encourage him to keep talking, asking questions and to verbalize whatever his little brain is thinking.
I also have to pretend that his toys speak to me too because he shoves them in my face and insists that I respond to them.
POINT #4: MASTER A FAST MORNING ROUTINE
Nobody gets faster than this Mommy in the morning in a panic to stop Baby Bun from doing… something.
Whatever that new daily something is.
Yesterday, it was climbing up on the ledge and trying to pull down the curtains.
POINT #5: PLAY A COMPETITIVE GAME
OMG it’s like they’re reading my mind.
Baby Bun and I
like to play this competitive game called “NAP WHO WHAT WHERE?”
It is extremely tough and takes serious concentration and patience.
I start out with 1000 points.
The rules are that Baby Bun is hustled into the bedroom for a nap, and I am scored based on how long it takes for me to plead, cajole and threaten him that he is the toddler, I’m the Mommy adult and HE NEEDS TO NAP now.
The longer I take to get him down for his nap, the less points I win.
I also lose points if I pat his butt in a soothing manner and then I fall asleep halfway through the process, he wakes up squawking and I have to get him settled back down again.
I score MAJOR points, like 50,000 if I can just point to the bed, say “Nap time now”, and he goes right to the pillow and puts his head down without protesting.
Bonus points scoring option:
If he wakes up after an hour and I am not done watching my shows on my laptop, if I can get him back to sleep for another hour, I win a billion points.
A billion points can be redeemed for a whole cheesecake, to be eaten alone without having to share it, in peace like below:
A photo posted by Sherry @ Save. Spend. Splurge. (@saverspender) on
POINT #6: WATCH THE NEWS
Baby Bun insists that we spend some time watching videos that talk about important world events, such as these recent headlines:
- SCIENCE: How high the Star called Twinkle Twinkle is up in the sky relative to us
- ECONOMY: Why this Sheep called Baa Baa is holding out on everyone who wants its wool
- HEALTH: How the Human Body functions a.k.a. Heads, Shoulders, Knees and Toes
- LIFE: Biography of Old MacDonald who had a farm and going into detail about all the noises each animal makes complete with facial expressions
POINT #7: ANSWER EMAILS
We do this together as evidenced above, and sometimes Baby Bun sends cryptic messages for his grandparents to figure out such as these following emails:
Or this one, my favourite:
“_______________________” [space bar]
..and other such important messages which may or may not have accidentally been sent to Mommy’s professional network on occasion.
(Blamed it on autocorrect.)
POINT #8: WALK THEIR DOG
I’m allergic to animals, so I’ll just put down our Walk To Get Mail excursion in place of this.
POINT #9: MEDITATE
You guys, I am SO GOOD AT THIS.
I meditate a lot when I am with Baby Bun.
With my eyes closed.
Sometimes snoring if I go into a deep trance.
Baby Bun also has this foolproof trick of releasing me from my trance by planting his two hands really hard on my face while I am meditating while saying: “Up!”
POINT #10: CHUG COFFEE OR GREEN TEA
I have this every morning, while Baby Bun is on my lap, with one arm around his belly, and smelling the top of his little toddler head.
He checks each time I take a sip, and then proclaims: “ALL DONE!” and claps when it’s all gone.