Week of Money: Where finding an appropriate Halloween costume seems impossible

DAY ONE

6:34 a.m. — I wake up. OMG. IT IS SO LATE. I have 20 minutes to get ready and go to get my favourite spot. This is not happening, I hate full garages and having to try and squeeze into a terrible spot.

7:01 a.m. — I hustle Little Bun and hassle him to get his clothes on, making him resist me even more until I take out my secret weapon — the cork pad for the pots and pans I thought would be good for rolling around in place of this cardboard “ball” that is getting ruined but it is too heavy and it bangs into the walls which annoys us. I wave it in front of his face like a treat and he immediately perks up at this new toy. “Only meant for school so you HAVE to go now”, I tell him firmly.

7:04 a.m. — “And you have to share it”, I remind him as I am putting on makeup but that triggers a burst of tears at not wanting to share his new, special toy. Inwardly I hope the educators don’t have to confiscate it, so I tell him he can stand up for himself and not share if he doesn’t want to for now by telling his friends and other babies that he is playing with it now. (I have no idea what to say but it is about time he learns how to say “No” and follow his own selfish instincts rather than have people tell him what he SHOULD do…)

7:11 a.m. — I get ready, decide on a construction worker chic look (basically cargo pants with menswear blazer & pointed loafers but with a cute necklace), and head off to work about 20 minutes later than normal. I quickly get Little Bun dressed. Oh. His pants have a hole in the knee. OH WELL. It’s … hipster little boy chic. He’s a hipster and this is now considered cool.

7:27 a.m. — I hit a HUGE knot of traffic (exactly what I hate) AND lose my favourite parking spot (Gahhhhh!!), but manage to back into a spot like a pro. Yassssss!!!

7:44 a.m. — I grab Little Bun, hustle him to preschool and hand him a snack bag and his cork toy. He bursts into tears and I hand him off to the educator who seems a bit overwhelmed as it is myself and another mother dropping off screaming children.

7:57 a.m. — I rush to work and my manager is already there (dang…), which means I will definitely have to stay a bit later. I normally get in before him.

8:23 a.m. — As I plop down and take out my lunch to put away I realize…. SHOOT. Forgot my avocado. My salad is going to suck today. Boo.

11:34 a.m. — I work until yoga time. All the way up until the end. SO MANY PEOPLE WANT SO MANY THINGS.

12:04 p.m. — I get to yoga, go through an easy flow and get back to work.

1:19 p.m. — I’m tired. My energy is down. I eat my salad and am (as predicted) disappointed in it as there is no avocado to substitute as “meat”.

4:23 p.m. — I finish working, and head off for some reading time alone. And to answer emails, and read blog posts. I have to cut back on my RSS reader and I’m spending time cleaning it up.

4:25 p.m. — I don’t have time to do any of what I planned. It is getting too close to 5, Little Bun will want to eat his snack leisurely… I won’t get home until late with the traffic if I don’t leave now.

4:27 p.m. — I pick up Little Bun and head home.

4:33 p.m. — It is cold and wet so in the car tell him we need to go home to clean and do laundry (all true), and play my latest obsession (these tracks) which Little Bun loves.

4:37 p.m. — WHAAAAT. NO TRAFFIC? ZERO? What happened!? Is everyone on vacation? This is AWESOME.

4:50 p.m. — Home in RECORD TIME. This is GREAT.

5:02 p.m. — I start a load of towels when I get home and decide to return an iPad cover I bought, I don’t need it. I have one that isn’t as cute but it is a COVER. Who cares?!? I start the return process on Amazon. -$36.44

5:05 p.m. — My partner starts working on the bathroom, fixing it up, knowing it will take all week to do this. ARRRGH WANT MY BATHROOM BACK *HULK SMASH*….

5:45 p.m. — I finish putting away my things, and eat Little Bun’s rejected garbage (his snack of grapes he didn’t eat during the day).

6:25 p.m. — Still hungry. Make some quick eggs. Little Bun won’t eat his soup so I am not making any noodles (he is SURE to fill up on that), and will wait until maybe 8-ish before throwing in the towel if I am too hungry and need more food.

6:37 p.m. — I prep my salad for tomorrow, NOT FORGETTING THE AVOCADO THIS TIME.

6:40 p.m. — I try not to squeal at Little Bun when he runs around doing nonsense, making noise, making my head hurt. Parents have so much pressure these days to NOT EFF UP THEIR CHILD. You read about psychologists who caution against yelling, trying to keep a calm home (what are we, freakin’ Scientologists!?!?), and then how YOU, THEIR MOMMY is the MODEL for the kind of partner they will have in the future (assuming they’re straight)…. You are your son’s female role model for their future female relationships. GREAT. JUST HEAP ON THE PRESSURE WHY DON’T YOU. We’re already stressed as is, trying to maintain their brains from going to mush with all this iPad time…

7:00 p.m. — Why is my iPod not syncing my videos? I HATE iTunes updates. I’m getting frustrated with this piece of crap software. Everything is good except for this idiotic interface and software. Why can’t things be simple for idiots like me?

7:15 p.m. — I call my mom and work out the details of a package I want her to ship to me. I have to print the label for her so it’s pre-paid by me.

7:23 p.m. — I’m returning those jeans. I’ll find them used online or something. I can’t stomach $200 jeans right now, especially white ones. -$196.21

7:36 p.m. — I pay my cellphone bill. $20 – my half is this; we share a phone

7:48 p.m. — I give in to Little Bun’ INSISTENCE (I think he gets it from me), and buy him those apps. Oh they better be worth it. $39.10

8:33 p.m. — My partner is covered in sweat, and he has finished working for tonight (3 1/2 hours!).. I try not to let my annoyance at how long this project is taking. I KNOW he is working hard. I KNOW it is hard work (he’s patching the ceiling), and I KNOW I’m being a pain in the bum but I really just.. want.. my … bathroom back.. I hate sharing. I’m too used to my own place now.

8:39 p.m. — I set out my outfit for tomorrow, go through my skincare routine, wrangle Little Bun into pyjamas, read a few pages from My Room and get him to go to sleep.

9:01 p.m. — Little Bun is in bed, and I’m patting his bum. I wish I could tell them to let him stop napping but the problem is he becomes even more of a monster (tired, annoying, frustrated), if he doesn’t get a BIT of a nap. If only we could tweak it by 15 minutes or something. I don’t know. He isn’t a robot. I’m tired. Really tired.

Saved: $232.65 – *pats self on back*

Spent: $59.10 – OH LITTLE BUN.

DAY TWO

6:22 a.m. — Little Bun is up “late” again, but I was already awake a bit before. Next time I should get up and start getting ready because I hate rushing and to be organized I need 45 minutes for him and I.

6:24 a.m. — He gets his milk from his father and I start making tea, then put away the dishes.

6:27 a.m. — I do my skincare routine and then say goodbye to my partner which causes Little Bun to scream: “No say goodbye to Daddyyyyyy!!!!”… because he knows it means SCHOOL.

6:40 a.m. — I manage to stop a meltdown in the works by proffering the iPad and all of the now ($60!!!) apps loaded on there. THERE. BE QUIET. I pull on my outfit. Going for Secretary in Japan today because the tie around the neck and the navy blue skirt sort of reminds me of their uniforms / outfits from all the anime I can remember…

6:44 a.m. — He happily matches and sorts and is rather adorable doing it (and quiet), but as I’m trying to get ready he went to the bathroom twice, needed his noses wiped 4 times and wanted me to not go to work today. It is a wonder I didn’t forget to put eyeliner on only one eye…

6:59 a.m. — I drink my tea, warn him it is his last game and then try to get him ready, hoping it won’t take long.

7:03 a.m. — He stands at the far edge of the hallway, resisting the bedroom with The Clothes That I Wear For School. “Not there! No want to stand THERE! Not in bedroom!”. OMG.

7:10 a.m. — I fight with him and get increasingly frustrated for about 10 minutes before I use my ultimate weapon: “Bye bye! Mommy leaves you at home!”…. and he bursts into a sob (fake) and clings to me, saying “Nooooooo”, and I manage to wrangle his clothes on while he is distracted.

7:12 a.m. — I get my boots on, grab my jacket, his jacket, our TWO lunches, AND my purse and now he wants me to carry him. Are you serious. “Talk to your toddler union rep because Mommy is not carrying you AND ALL THIS STUFF”, I tell him.

7:13 a.m. — I get him to get into an elevator where an obviously childless man grips onto his poor, frightened dog and eyes Little Bun and I, suspecting that he is witnessing why he has avoided being a father for so long. Little Bun LOSES IT with a five-alarm shriek because I told him the button for our floor was already pressed and he didn’t want the dog to press it (I thought that was a nice touch on my part, telling him the dog did it as his friend. Apparently not.)

7:15 a.m. — We get out of the elevator and he bursts into another ear-splitting shriek that only Little Bun can muster at the wrong time and the man escapes, thanking his lucky stars he has a dog and not a child I’m sure.

7:17 a.m. — He tugs on my hand and I gently let him go so his bum hits the floor (I am not a monster, for the record …) and say: “Okay bye bye!”, and he runs after me sobbing. (I’d never leave him but when he is in this kind of mood, you cannot do anything because if you give in and pander to him, he will just continue sobbing the whole time and make you LATE FOR WORK…..)

7:20 a.m. — We get to the car, I unload the fifty billion things I’m toting singlehandedly, pick him up and hold him sobbing against my hip while I organize my things and comfort him.

7:24 a.m. — I get him in his seat, wipe his tears and hand him a secret twig (just a stick from a tree) I have been keeping in the car to distract him. It works. He holds his special twig and I tuck a blanket around him.

7:25 a.m. — I then get into the car, and set up my playlist to drive.

7:26 a.m. — Little Bun, backseat music manager, vetos all of my songs saying: “no this one!”, “no want this one!”, “nexxxxxxxt!!!!” (he wants Matsuba’s Kings and Queens of Summer), until I say in frustration: “Mommy is in charge here! I get to pick the music! I’m driving! When you drive then you get to pick!”, she says, convincing no one.

7:36 a.m. — I get to his preschool, and drop off only works because they have a new looking stick sort of rolled up wafer snack and he is all over it. NO TEARS. He just eats his emotions of having to see Mommy leave, and shoves the pain deep into his core, burying it as he should, and covering it with this snack.

7:41 a.m. —I get to work and start… working. So many people around me but I put in headphones and get my stuff organized.

9:20 a.m. — I get an email and I order that iPad mount my partner wants for the home. It comes out to $150 but I pay half only. $75

9:45 a.m. — I start working on another issue and feel defeated. No one has documented anything. Do I spend time and make it nice and pretty or just jam in my changes and leave it as the swampy, sick mess it is? Ugh….

10:01 a.m. — Wait, I have to pay for shipping back for this iPad cover? I’ll keep it then. $20 to ship back a $36 item? I feels all the sicks in doing that. Going to keep it then…

10:22 a.m. — I also make an appointment with a friend to get my headshot done this week. The price of a coffee is one I can afford!

10:43 a.m. — I call my doctor to make an appointment but she says I have to call on a Monday, they’re all booked up. WTF? So give me next week then.

10:55 a.m. — I feel like my weekends are filling up, and it is not bad but I have to juggle all of this…

11:24 a.m. — I steal off to yoga and love wearing my cosy shawl under my leather jacket. Best of both worlds, really!

1:19 p.m. — I get back to work, warm up my lunch (yummy) and finish with some jellybeans . Everyone has been leery about eating them because of that whole Bertie’s Botts Every Flavour thing with Harry Potter but I reassured them that they were not gross ones.

3:24 p.m. — My brain stops working. I can’t concentrate on anything. I try to take a break but I just want to leave.

4:15 p.m. — I grab Little Bun and head home. I’m too tired to think. I just want to flop into bed and sleep.

5:08 p.m. — I make it home, late as usual because of traffic, and try to get petrol for the car. It somehow, doesn’t work, and I am completely defeated. I don’t even want to go inside to work this #%(*#% out. Your machine should work, I shouldn’t have to deal with this crap and I just drive off.

5:39 p.m. — At home, I remove makeup, start a load of laundry, put away Little Bun’s dirty dishes in the sink, and pray that my partner has food tonight because I kind of need something. Otherwise it’ll be noodles but I ate all the eggs yesterday. I did not plan this out tonight but I was just … in a brain fog. You know what I mean, where your brain just goes blank and you can’t even process simple words and actions? My brain is that. Exhausted.

5:41 p.m. — I set out my clothes for tomorrow. I need to pack stuff this weekend to mail off to a friend. MUST GET THIS DONE.

6:14 p.m. — My partner gets home. I HOPE THERE IS FOOD.

6:17 p.m. — Oh camembert!!! YESS!!! I knew he’d bring something. He came back too late to be empty handed …

6:18 p.m. — I put on a sweater (a thrifted Ralph Lauren men’s one), and wear my indoor Queen UGG slippers because my feet are cold.

6:19 p.m. — Little Bun protests the wardrobe change and squeals: “No sweater! No boots!!!”, and I tell him Mommy is cold, and he lets it go.

6:25 p.m. — I quickly feed Little Bun some of his vegan soup (to get SOME veggies into him), and oatmeal, and then peel a banana for myself.

6:44 p.m. — As I’m eating the banana, Little Bun comes up and says: “Share?? Mommy has to share????”, and we share the banana; by share, I mean he takes HUGE bites and as it gets down to the end, he takes the entire last bit stuffing his face like a chipmunk. O_o … give an inch…. he already had a banana this morning by the way so I do have to watch his potassium intake as he could eat bananas all day if you let him.

6:47 p.m. — Tea time. I make a cup while we wait for the cheese to warm up and ripen to room temperature. (Yes, you cannot eat cheese that is cold, the flavours don’t develop, the insides don’t get soft and deliciously runny… and each cheese has its own waiting period; this one will take about half an hour to warm up for the best taste possible).

6:59 p.m. — I attack the bread and cheese. As we are eating, Little Bun says: “PEE PEE!”, and I go to take him but he says: “For Daddy!!!” (Meaning he wants his father to do it). I’m so happy right now…. I happily say: “DADDY!” and sit back to chow down on cheese and bread.

7:11 p.m. — Little Bun crawls around and his father asks if he is a cat. OMG I forgot! I need an outfit for him for Halloween. And so it begins. All the tasks and events tied to having a child.

7:12 p.m. — My partner starts working on the bathroom. I hope it’s a small fix tonight…

7:18 p.m. — I also need 2 pairs of brown knee high socks. In a fit of organizing, I tossed them to be donated without realizing that I’d have to wear tights under my skirts and dresses with boots if I don’t have socks!

7:29 p.m. — I set out my outfit for tomorrow. A simple sweater dress. Comfy and easy.

7:30 p.m. — I contemplate leaving the dishes…. and then remember my promise / vow to NOT leave a dirty sink at night to see if it feels better at not having a huge sink to complete every 3 days. I do all of them and dry what I can (I have to leave some out so that the plastic lids can stand up and drip dry against them)…

7:47 p.m. — I snag Little Bun and try to get him to come to the bedroom to read “My Room” and go to sleep. He resists, but I tell him to at least get ready for bed and then he can have the iPad to do “More School”. He rips off his clothes and runs around the apartment naked, giggling like crazy, throwing his underwear all over the place like a toy. I wish I could videotape this for future blackmailing purposes if I wasn’t so dang tired..

8:03 p.m. — Little Bun DRESSED. I take him into his area, give him the iPad, and start reading my book, while starting a cup of spearmint tea and honey.

9:13 p.m. — WHOA IT IS LATE. I was so engrossed in reading, and making notes, and tea… I didn’t realize a whole hour passed. My partner also didn’t come out to go to sleep so I lost track of time. I quickly hustle Little Bun to bed after of course, reading a page from My Room, and then explaining the outside while cuddling him on my lap with a blanket around us (I LOVE this moment at night just before bed and take all the chances I can to kiss him constantly).

Saved: -$36.44 – I am keeping that iPad cover after all… this minuses out yesterday’s savings 🙁

Spent: $75

DAY THREE

??:?? — Little Bun wakes me up early and I’m getting used to this now. I get him his milk but then he wants to go to the bathroom and gets upset the order of the day is now all messed up, so he makes me put the milk back in the fridge, take him to the bathroom and THEN get his milk and Mommy has to say: “Don’t run please”, in that order. Yes. This takes 10 minutes longer than it should.

5:47 a.m.  — I tuck him in, my partner is conked out trying to stay in bed as long as possible (I will get to have some time after work to myself to blog alone at the library so this is fair), and I start making my tea and getting ready.

5:51 a.m. — Now Little Bun wants videos of himself.

6:03 a.m. — Now, ironically he wants the iPad to do “School” (name of the educational apps are “Tiny Hands” and I bought this bundle of 8 for about $40 CAD and he LOOOOVVVESSS them).

6:17 a.m. — I get dressed in a sweater dress and do my makeup only to realize a belt looks weird with this outfit but I need a belt because I have a badge to wear. Arrergh.

6:29 a.m. — I change my outfit at least 4 times before settling on a skirt and top option. My partner puts a pillow over his head to block out the closet light from seeping into his eyeballs as I am in and out trying out different outfits, belts, etc…. I love my vintage wool skirts from the thrift shop. They are such good quality!!! And have POCKETS!!!

6:38 a.m. — Am going to be glad I have a cashmere tank on right now. This thing is COSY.

6:42 a.m. — I put away the dishes, and I think I’m getting sick because I’m tired (and I did sleep well), and I’m all sniffly. I hate a runny nose, ruins my makeup and makes me look like Rudolph.

7:01 a.m. — I get ready to go, forget my lunch and have to take off my boots and grab it, then start again.

7:03 a.m. — I kiss Little Bun goodbye after telling him to ask his father IF he can stay home (Secret Mommy Ninja Trick #942: Make it seem like he might go to school with Mommy even though you know he is staying at home so that he is relieved when his father says “Yes” and doesn’t make a scene when you leave.)

7:11 a.m. — Drama-free, I drive to work.

7:43 a.m. — At the office I start working. Brain is at half speed. I just want to sleep, rest, and read a book. I brought my laptop today to go to the library to work on the blog afterwards.

8:25 a.m. — Now nothing works. I restart the computer and get another tea.

9:33 a.m. — Know what is the worst? Working with people who are juniors but don’t want to admit they are new. JUST ASK. I’m not going to bite. It is better than making a mistake and having me get annoyed.

9:44 a.m. — I head out to return those great high-rise white, NOT SEE THROUGH jeans to ShopBop and by a miracle I found the exact brand new with tags jeans online for only $85, down from the $317.13 I originally paid. Score! $85.72 – shipping & import taxes included

9:59 a.m. — I pick up a Starbucks because it is Double Star day. $5.11

10:12 a.m. — I also pick up a new bottle of dressing. I worked out that for about $14 a week, I have replaced $100 worth of gourmet salads. Even if I increased the ingredients to add more fancy things, I’m still saving 80%…. $5.29

11:01 a.m. — I head back to work and get frustrated at the bottleneck in the approval process. I just like to work and get stuff done and I am BORED. I’m waiting for everyone else and then they’re going to approve it all at once and annoy me with work. Sigh. I can’t get a balance going. I take on a few more tasks because I’m a sucker for pain.

11:36 a.m. — I head off to yoga and nail a pose called “Birds of Paradise” where you wrap your arms behind your back and around one leg, and lift up that leg so your leg is straight and it looks like your arms are a circle around it. NAILED IT.

12:10 p.m. — I head back to work and eat my lunch. I’m sniffly today and my eyes are watering… I think I’m allergic to something. Work maybe.

2:25 p.m. — I finish off the jellybeans. I’m still hungry.

3:10 p.m. — I drink some water and crave soft, pillowy, warm, white bread with a crisp fresh crust… Mmmmm.

4:00 p.m. — I AM OUT OF HERE. It is FREE BUN TIME and I am going to the library. Today is gorgeous too.

5:30 p.m. — I work on blog posts and schedule one while making sure to order my partner’s request for these Frye Chelsea boots online. He wanted them in dark brown.

5:35 p.m. — I head back a bit early, I need to undress, shower, start laundry… lots of things to do.

5:42 p.m. — I squeeze in ONE MORE POST and then leave.

5:48 a.m. — OKAY. A THIRD POST. NOW I AM LEAVING.

6:17 p.m. — I get home and there is no food. Noodles it is!! Time to eat my stash. (However, I did very strongly contemplate going out for sushi, to be honest).

6:24 p.m. — I prep the water for soba noodles and make some spearmint tea while I’m at it. My partner is working in the bathroom and Little Bun is playing on the bed jumping like a kangaroo.

6:32 p.m. — I make the tea, and eye the sink — how did it get so full?? It was EMPTY this morning!!! Arggggh. I contemplate leaving them but there is too much so I really should do them, but leave them to air dry rather than to hand dry them.

7:30 p.m. — We have been spying on a neighbour of mine and I excitedly wave my partner over to the window: “Look!! His girlfriend is a young blonde!!!!” (he’s 55-ish). We both wish we had strong binoculars on hand.

7:35 p.m. — I finish making the noodles, set aside a Little Bun share, and we eat them together.

7:44 p.m. — I then start on the dishes while he plays and watches videos of himself.

7:59 p.m. — Shower!!! I have to shower. I almost forgot. Can you believe forgetting to shower!

8:15 p.m. — After my shower, I get ready for bed and get Little Bun ready too. His father has been working all night so I take over the rest of the childcare duties to give him a break.

8:28 p.m. — Bedtime. Everyone is in bed.

Saved: $0

Spent: $96.12

DAY FOUR

??:?? — I wake up from Little Bun wanting the bathroom…and I know it is late (or super early) because I don’t hear anyone awake.

6:00 a.m. — Now I’m up from Little Bun trying to crawl up on me saying: “Wanna sleep on Mommy?” And he crawls on my body while I hold him and my partner wakes up. He wiggles his bum and says: “Mommy patch bum!??” (Patch = Pat)… and I tell him to go ask his father for milk, and he gets up instantly and thunder stomps our to the kitchen squealing: “Millllllk!!!!!”

6:11 a.m. — His father brings the bottle (I’m still in bed), and as he drinks it, I get up and start putting the dishes away, drying what is still wet, making some tea and then getting dressed. It is nice to have this alone time to chat while we are both getting lunches ready (he gets mine out for me), and Little Bun is occupied.

6:19 a.m. — Little Bun gets up, gives his bottle to his father and then immediately proclaims: “Today is Thursday! Stay at home wif Daddy!!!!”… and his father laughs telling him it isn’t everyday. His face falls and he starts squealing: “No want school!!” Ugh.

6:25 a.m. — I ignore his whining and he runs into me full force, asking to be carried, saying “Carry you? CARRY YOU PLEASE!!!” (He doesn’t understand “me” and “you”, so he says “Carry you” because I always ask him: “Do you want me to carry you?”. It is kind of interesting watching how language is learned.

6:30 a.m. — We cuddle and hug, I hold him tight and bounce back and forth on my heels like when he was a baby, loving his little boy body against mine, giving him kisses and whispering that today is a school day.

6:33 a.m. — Finally, I set down his heavy bum (he is HUGE), and give him the iPad with school apps on it so I can get ready. He rejects it and wants videos of himself as a baby, so I turn on laptop.

6:35 a.m. — In the meantime his father leaves and Little Bun and I wave goodbye at the door after he gives a big hug and kiss.

6:37 a.m. — Once he is situated, I start on my skincare routine and makeup.

6:55 a.m. — I get dressed, drink my tea and now negotiate with my little boy. He gives in on wearing pants and underwear for school but I lose on him NOT wearing his favourite shirt outside to school (it has holes in it and they probably think I’m a hobo mother now).

7:03 a.m. — I get him in the car, and halfway through the street he lets out a blood curdling wail, screaming for his blanket .. and he wants me to drive back to the garage to park the car, put it on him, THEN drive to work. OMG NO. I put the blanket on him after finding a spot to park and tell him I’m not going back to the garage to do this. It is Blanket now or not at all! He pipes down.

7:19 a.m. — We get there, he is suckered in by a pita slice he thinks is a crepe (LOL) and eats it while I make my escape. No tears.

7:45 a.m. — At work I try to figure out what is going on with an issue but we can’t seem to find out why it isn’t working. No clue. Argh.

9:11 a.m. — I spend the morning half chatting to a coworker and half working. My brain needs a break.

10:41 a.m. — Hmm. All the execs are a little uptight today. Not chatty, a bit tightly wound…. I steer far away from them and get to work.

11:25 a.m. — I head off to yoga early. It is warm. AGAIN. Why did I wear boots?!? Gah. Every time I dress in wool it ends up being hot. Then I dress lightly and it is freezing. I can’t win.

1:44 p.m. — Back at the office, I continue working and my manager hands me a sheet to fill in with details. I start and then he is surprised when I do the details and the summary in less than an hour. It took him the whole day to do just a small portion. I just type and think quickly so that helps…. anyway he is pleased and I like a happy manager. It is also why I think I do the work of at least two people in the time of just one.

2:00 p.m. — I chat with a colleague about our plans to move and live abroad for a year and we will table it for a little bit until I’m more secure here. I haven’t quite felt out the situation and I want to see how it plays out.

4:26 p.m. — I get more work done and then leave. I’m tired. I grab Little Bun and we head home to drop things off and then to the park.

5:01 p.m. — We go to the park, but he refuses to wear his jacket until I force him to. It is cool but not chilly.

5:04 p.m. — At the park I try to blow bubbles which attracts a lot of children around me but Little Bun doesn’t want to share the bubbles. Sigh. I pretend there is no more left so I can avoid an issue of a meltdown from NOT WANTING TO SHARE.

5:25 p.m. — I eye a car circling the block. Either they are practicing for a license or I should be concerned. They have gone around at least 15 times….

5:41 p.m. — I grab Little Bun and we head home. Now it is getting cold.

5:49 p.m. — Okay so the car circling is a woman who doesn’t know how to drive and is practicing, which makes more sense than a creeper. My partner sees her almost smash the car into the pole in the garage and says it is not a car she can drive comfortably.

6:03 p.m. — Little Bun and I head upstairs and he gets milk while I take off my makeup. I hate the MAC wipes (feels oily), the Ole Henriksen smells the best, and the nicest ones could be the Garnier with Micellar Water. With all of the brands I have tried however, the wipe is tiny and there isn’t enough liquid so I’m using two each time which is a very bad deal. I think I may just go back to the Kirkland Costco Brand. They were HUGE, full of liquid and worked very well; I only needed one to do the job, not the two I’m using each time now.

6:10 p.m. — My partner didn’t bring anything home to eat because he is working on the bathroom. Wish I knew that BEFORE because I’m starving now. I did not plan ahead this week to not have any dinner made and I don’t want noodles again.

6:32 p.m. — I eat my lunch for tomorrow, for dinner while I feed Little Bun his vegan soup. I’ll go out to eat tomorrow after yoga; I may have to leave the class early… maybe I can buy some pho to go.. or some yummy buns.

6:45 p.m. — Little Bun works on his world puzzle, breaking it up “Mix up!!!” And putting it back together again twice. He is actually starting to know the countries and read things with accurate guesses like “Northern Sea” is what he guessed for “Norwegian Sea”, which is quite close meaning he read the “Nor” and filled in the rest. “This is Ethiopia!”, and he loves Antarctica the best. I sort of want to buy this one next…

7:10 p.m. — I’ve decided that I’m going to buy a new yoga mat. I need it. It has been at least 8 years and mine is pretty much in shreds now and each time I do yoga, more pieces break off. I have been putting it off because there are no holes in it per se, but .. enough is enough. This is not the time to cheap out on something I use often. I’ve been eying mats online and so far, am very pleased with this one made in Spain but moving to Canada called the B-Mat. It looks good and with a 10% off coupon? SWEET. $80.73

7:37 p.m. — Little Bun and I get ready for bed.

7:45 p.m. — I putter around the kitchen, cleaning things, but not washing any dishes, and then flop down to read my book while Little Bun plays.

8:25 p.m. — I read to him and then we all go to sleep.

Saved: $8.97 – yoga mat was 10% off

Spent: $80.73

DAY FIVE

??:?? — I hear a snuffle and a little cry: “Mamaaaa……”, and Little Bun wiggles close to me, finding my warm side and curling up on my arm so that I’m cuddling him tight. I wrap a blanket around him and pat his bum a bit, hugging him close. He drops back into a deep sleep then rolls off me a minute or two later.

6:40 a.m. — Little Bun wakes up, checks the living room and says: “Mommy it is still night. Back to sleep!”. I mumble something and pull him close to me to cuddle, but then he wants his bum patted and doesn’t seem to be falling back asleep.

6:50 a.m. — I see that it looks a little too bright so it must be closer to 7 now and I get up with him to get milk.

7:01 a.m. — Whoa. I realize that I woke up LATE. Little Bun slept in until almost 7!!!!!!! No time for tea today. I bolt out of bed, pull on my outfit, start my skincare routine and in 20 minutes am done, even with letting my skin dry so I can apply makeup.

7:22 a.m. — I curl my lashes and grab my bag to go. No lunch to remember today, I ate it last night and will buy food today.

7:44 a.m. — I get to the office not quite as early as I wanted, and start working. I take lunch orders from people to see if they want anything and warn them it will be after my yoga.

8:23 a.m. — I start working on an email with some options for a proposal my manager has, and then take a break to put some post-its on my salad dressing and soy milk in the fridge to guard it from being tossed today (they’re cleaning it out).

8:49 a.m. — Back to work. I take the time to clean up my desk and papers. It is driving me nuts this mess and I need to make sure it is clean.

11:03 a.m. — I work and leave a bit early to do my rounds of errands before yoga.

11:24 a.m. — I buy everyone’s request. $39.98 but will get reimbursed later. My actual purchases are $14.36

12:45 p.m. — I head into yoga and work it out. She’s trying to teach us to do some Flying Pigeon pose when we can’t even do a dang CROW! (But I am getting there).

1:16 p.m. — I book it back to the office to eat and distribute goodies. Everyone is so happy for the cake for the weekend.

1:25 p.m. — I begin working while eating my lunch and the VP sent out a note to dress up for Halloween. I feel like this is a trick but also can’t take it lightly. We have to do SOMETHING. Crap. Now I need a Halloween costume for the office that is comfortable to work in and not too sexy. ARG. Need a witty outfit!!!! For myself and Little Bun!!!! THIS IS NOT GOING TO BE GOOD.

2:34 p.m. — I gulp down a huge carafe of water (these buns are salty!)…

4:00 p.m. — Everyone leaves early. I’m out too. I need to google some work appropriate costumes. This is gonna suck. I hate DIY (I suck at it), and I sort of don’t want to buy anything.

4:30 p.m. — Okay. Costumes. Wish I could just wear some cat ears. May phone it in and wear some cat ears. Can’t do anything too cutesy because I’m a young woman so I don’t want THAT tag placed on me. I need something else. ARG ALL THIS PRESSURE. PRESSURE. I need to come up with something.

5:05 p.m. — Spent the last half hour googling and I am nowhere. I will need to go home and reflect upon this. I also don’t want to walk around the office in something too outrageous. STRESS.

5:35 p.m. — Okay. I’m really done Googling costumes now.

6:25 p.m. — I poll my partner about possible outfits. He vetos pretty much all of them because culturally speaking, he has no idea WTF what they represent.

6:42 p.m. — He gets the food started on the grill and we keep talking.

6:43 p.m. — Little Bun suddenly bursts out into a wail and squeal, and collapses against me (drama queen in the making?), and he turns into an absolute squealing, wailing monster, saying: “NO TALKING. NO MOMMY AND DADDY TALKING“… whaaat!?!? I firmly tell him that we are talking because we miss each other and this is not very nice of him. I hold him tight and whisper-ask if he missed me today. He nods and says “Yes“… I tell him I missed him a lot too, and then we cuddle.

6:48 p.m. — All right now, he hops off my legs and runs to the bedroom to play with the blankets and his toy.

7:05 p.m. — Dinner on the table, I don’t bother calling him to eat. I just peel the food off, prep it before eating and eat leisurely, talking to my partner. Little Bun filled up on olive bread so he’s fine, he doesn’t seem to want chicken at all; I suspect we’ve raised a vegetarian…. 🙂

7:24 p.m. — I have a nice conversation with my partner, and Little Bun eats a few pieces of bread after my partner calls him out to eat some. He refuses the chicken.

7:45 p.m. — I clean up the counter, and think about leaving the dishes for tomorrow morning… and decide that I can’t. I would wake up in a grumpy, grouchy mood. Little Bun plays with his father and reads out words on the iPad with the language app.

8:23 p.m. — Dishes done. I was listening to podcasts while I was doing them instead of music (music makes me want to dance).

8:47 p.m. — Little Bun doesn’t want to stop playing but I finally set a final “one last hop and skip, then bed”, and then he panics and asks for a book, so we do ONE reading then go to sleep.

Saved: $0

Spent: $14.36

DAY SIX

??:?? — Nosebleed.

??:?? — Squealing. He’s cold. I cover him in a blanket.

6:46 a.m. — We’re all up. I feel tired. I think I’m getting sick, he’s getting sick, and I am not sleeping well….

7:09 a.m. — Today is my shoot with a photographer for my LinkedIn professional headshot (I do this every 5-ish years when I start looking a little off from my picture online LOL)… I need to do my makeup before I go. Maybe we can get a shot in with Little Bun to mail to my parents. I organize my list for today while my partner works on the bathroom bright and early.

8:04 a.m. — I prep a salad to eat for the morning (yes, a breakfast salad…), two cups of green tea (luxurious! I missed my tea from yesterday), and spend the rest of the time Googling costumes. I need to get this done before the weekend, so that in case I need a plan B, I can go out and buy something else next weekend for Halloween.

8:45 a.m. — I go back to Googling and organizing my day. Photo shoot, have an IPL appointment for my skin, need to return that MAC bag & those terrible makeup wipes, then buy some DIY crafts for my outfit for Halloween. SO MUCH TO DO.

10:02 a.m. — I feed Little Bun his meal, then I end up vacuuming the entire apartment, clipping Little Bun’s nails (yes this is an endeavour), fixing up a presentation I’m making as a surprise gift to my mother, and then trying to locate my old Banana Cake recipe that Little Bun deleted a while back when he erased my life.

11:32 a.m. — My partner comes home with groceries and food just as I am cleaning up the papers, and I start getting ready to go meet my friend for the shoot (full on makeup), and I also take a shot with Little Bun dressed up for my mother (she requested a recent shot of me.

11:45 a.m. — We eat a quick meal of bread and ham, which Little Bun gobbles down and loves. I spend the next hour carefully doing my makeup.

12:42 p.m. — As I leave, Little Bun LOSES IT. Again, this is becoming the norm for him. He just wants Mommy 24/7. I think he is also getting sick so it isn’t helping.

12:59 p.m. — I head off to get gas in the car (am running on fumes) before seeing my friend. $67.08

1:10 p.m. — I gas up the car, head to grab her coffee. I also pick up two slices of banana bread just in case. The cashier just stared at me and when I handed her the money and waited she blushed and said: “Sorry, I was looking at you”, to which I replied: “I know, my makeup is ridiculously thick right? It is for a picture.”. She doesn’t say anything. $7.75

1:25 p.m. — I meet my friend and the receptionist says she can’t do the shoot. What!? My face falls. What happened??!! Turns out she had an emergency with her child last night and is not feeling it. I want to cry. I spent all morning prepping.

1:30 p.m. — I go in to see her and ask what happened and am relieved first that she is okay but she also DEFINITELY did not flake and brought her camera just in case. OH THANK GOD, I collapse against the wall with happiness. I didn’t get dressed up like this to be disappointed!!!! I hand her the massive coffee and we go and take shots. She takes a ton and I think we have it. My hair is not great but I don’t care. I tell her just to send it to me raw, I’ll Photoshop them myself.

1:45 p.m. — I tell her about my costume dilemma and she says she is going as female Waldo this year.

1:50 p.m. — On the way out, a mother hears my Halloween plight and offers her daughter’s old Winnie The Pooh costume. We exchange info.

2:02 p.m. — I drive to the nearest thrift store to see if I can find ANYTHING for Little Bun. I score a bear costume with a hood but the feet are missing. Huh. Maybe I can buy the lion feet too but I don’t have any cash left to pay for it so I just get the costume. $4

3:01 p.m. — I drop everything off in my car and walk to the metro. $2.25

3:12 p.m. — I run and return the bag and the wipes (terrible and DRY!!) to MAC. Their customer service at that location is really bad. They ignored me for 10 minutes and when it was my turn, the girl walked away. WTF. NEVER SHOPPING HERE AGAIN. -$77.03

3:25 p.m. — I book it to Banana Republic to take a quick peek (got $175 credit to spend), then walk to go try and find a dang beige dress that isn’t too tight and not a slip dress. I hit up Forever 21 and am thankful for the first time in my life that pretty young things like to wear tight, skin-coloured garb. I find plenty of options all of which I veto for various reasons (too high cut in the neck which would look weird with ruffles for foam, and lace-up options).

3:44 p.m. — I finally settle just as I’m about to give up, for a scoop-neck ribbed tank dress in Large (no more Medium left), and I’ll take up the sleeves to be not so low cut. I tried on the Small but it is a little too sexy for the office (too tight).. $18.90

3:58 p.m. — Whoa. I’m totally killing my errands today. Now for some white felt and I’m good to go for DIY.

4:00 p.m. — I get to my appointment and she finishes in 45 minutes.

4:45 p.m. — I hop off the bed and go to get the rest of my costume.

4:59 p.m. —  At Dollarama they don’t have only white felt (they have small samples of felt in various colours), but I get a hot glue gun and some glue sticks because I suspect I will need them. $5.75

5:02 p.m. — As I wait in line, this guy has his hand deep in the back of his jeans, scratching while talking to his girlfriend. Have we no shame?!?

5:11 p.m. — I stop by Michaels and buy some white felt and am shocked at the prices!!! $10?!? That’s a buck a sheet! $11.50

5:24 p.m. — So far this costume is costing me about $40 to make as I didn’t have many of the supplies but I resist the temptation to be PERFECT by buying the forest green Duck Tape at $6 for the straw — painter’s tape is good enough. It isn’t the perfect forest green but I’m not spending a fortune on this costume. I AM NOT.

5:40 p.m. — The only part of the costume I haven’t had to buy are the black tights, black heels and headband. LOL. I was going to use my beige dress for this with long sleeves but it wouldn’t look as good as a tank dress in beige with my arms free because a drink wouldn’t be all over the place and ABOVE the foam… right?!? I see why people plan this stuff ahead of time.

5:43 p.m. — Back on the metro to get to my car where I left it. $2.25

6:02 p.m. — I find $10 in my wallet (couldn’t locate a bank) and decide to buy the lion feet for Little Bun’s random costume. It would look too strange with little sneakers and not actual bear/lion FEET.

6:15 p.m. — OMG! I found the lion costume’s top of the head, the ears and the body. It would be perfect!!!!!

6:24 p.m. — Okay. No. I end up not buying the lion costume because it is for 2T (2 Toddler, for you non-parents) and it would be far too small for him. Too bad. I’m really disappointed.

6:35 p.m. — I check through the racks for any more inspiration (hmm.. pumpkin? He does like pumpkins …) but decide the bear outfit is good enough even without the feet, and I’ll hit up my siblings for their childrens’ Halloween castoffs for the future. THEY spent good money on this stuff…I organize my notes and then walk around to see what else there is. I don’t want to overthink this.

6:40 p.m. — I go back home a bit late, and my partner starts working (he can’t work with Little Bun around, he needs to be watched, so I feel a bit guilty for taking so long). I reconcile my budget (still squealing under $1500 but the end of the month it will happily be busted with a friend visiting me – yay!).

6:45 p.m. — I come home to a call on my card asking if I spent $2000+ at Kohls, Walmart, Kmart, etc. Whoa. Definitely not me, I’ve never shopped at Kmart on my life. I veto the charges and only confirm the ones that apply to me. I cut up the card and toss the pieces away.

7:02 p.m. — Little Bun watches himself on the video as I get organized, and then I read more of my book. I love the Andy Cohen Diaries. Lots of name-dropping but he comes across as a very normal, albeit star-studded individual. Stars, they’re just like us… but their cars are 100X more expensive, their houses are 50X bigger, their meals are 25X this… that’s it. But at the end of the day, they’re doing what we’re doing — spending time with friends, family and enjoying life. *shrug*

7:44 p.m. — We eat dinner super late. My partner makes an amazing chicken gizzard (yes, YUMMY!) salad with potatoes, and I suggest rice for the next addition instead of potatoes to fill up my belly.

8:37 p.m. — Little Bun gets ready for bed (finally).. and then plays on the iPad while I read.

9:13 p.m. — WHOA. TIME TO SLEEP. EVERYONE IN BED NOW.

Saved: $77.03

Spent: $119.48

DAY SEVEN

??:?? — Little Bun wails and cries from a nightmare and I groggily wake up and pull him close to me, whispering: Shhhh.. Mommy’s here.

6:00 a.m. — Tired. Very tired. Little Bun is making the rounds on the bed, jumping around and walking, and wants to go to the bathroom. I take him, grab his milk and come back to bed.

6:26 a.m. — He’s up. I entertain him with videos of himself as a baby. I try not to pass out as I put away all the dishes and wipe down the kitchen.

6:49 a.m. — I start a load of laundry – kitchen towels to soak in hot water with Oxiclean.

7:00 a.m. — My partner is still trying to “sleep” so I try to keep Little Bun quiet to let him rest. He has been working like crazy.

7:18 a.m. — My partner is up and I dial my friend to chat. I love reconnecting on the phone but it is hard with Little Bun as I have to  constantly entertain him and keep him quiet while I talk but he hates it when I am on the phone. I am sure my friend is deaf by now from all the screaming.

7:48 a.m. — I sew up the straps of a dress of my costume and am surprised at how neat my stitches are.

8:26 a.m. — I take him out to the park to run off his energy and keep talking to her.

9:56 a.m. — Tired, he wants to come back and play “Baby” which is code for him being (A) Hungry, and (B) Tired. I take him back in.

10:18 a.m. — I hang up on my friend and we have a nice lunch together, a new salad this time of brown rice, eggs, tomatoes, spring lettuce, avocado, and homemade croutons. SO GOOD. My partner was skeptical about the rice but now is a believer and prefers the brown basmati rice to the potatoes in a salad for belly ooomph.

11:02 a.m. — Finished, I eye the counter full of dishes and decide to do them after Little Bun’s nap. I want to dress up today and do a family photo outside (yes I am getting it ALL DONE TODAY), and I can do the dishes, THEN dress up for this shot outside with a tripod.

12:08 p.m. — Little Bun has been resisting the nap for the past hour (exhausting).

12:28 p.m. — STILL NOT NAPPING. I continue reading my book.

12:56 p.m. — I finally get him down and just as his eyelids close, he murmurs: “Want to Mommy to nap.. Mommy nap!“… I wish. If I napped now, I wouldn’t sleep well tonight. It’s a vicious cycle.

1:09 p.m. — I leave him to fall asleep, and make a spearmint mint and Banana Bread hybrid tea (wonder how this will taste) to see if this is anything….. I really do think the spearmint tea is helping my hormonal acne so I need to keep this up.

1:44 p.m. — Little Bun is up and asking for milk (and fun). I give him milk and look outside. He notices my gaze and says: “Mommy. It’s sunny outside. Can go outside for Sunday TRAIN DAY!!!” He has a point.

2:11 p.m. — I attempt to do the dishes, but my partner is working and making a mess everywhere, and painting.. so it is safer to take Little Bun out and just not get in his way.

2:34 p.m. — I take him out towards the bus and JUST miss it. Arrrg.

3:18 p.m. — We walk, hop and jump around as we wait, walking to the next stop. The next one finally arrives. $2.25

 

3:45 p.m. — On the way downtown, I wanted to take him to the book store but I am suddenly hit with a wave of dizziness. Oh. Crap. I need to go home. This bus driver is a terrible stop-start driver and it triggered my motion sickness almost immediately.

3:55 p.m. — I take Little Bun on the train, and we ride it all the way back and forth while I try not to throw up.

4:22 p.m. — I get him back on the bus to go home. He protests going home but I tell him Mommy is VERY sick right now (which he does not understand because then he squeals:” DELETE MOMMY SICK! Delete sick! No sick!” I wish. $2.25

5:00 p.m. — He. Is. A. Monster. A LITTLE MONSTER. I have him in my arms, he wants to be carried now, he is all sleepy and tired from all the walking and jumping, and then he doesn’t want to go home, so he pulls me to the park but I am really about to collapse and vomit on the sidewalk. I finally just leave him as he runs screaming after me to lift him up, and have to carry him, WHILE NAUSEOUS all the way home (6 blocks). This kid is heavy, might I add. I am feeling sick AF. He is also screaming, kicking, crying… this is … the worst. I really don’t want to chance going back out with him ever again on the metro.

5:23 p.m. — I make it home, my arms, my back, my legs are aching, I’m dizzy, nauseous, I have to undress him, undress myself, remove my sunscreen with a wipe, and then I collapse on the bed as the room spins around me. I doze on and off for 25 minutes as he (THANKFULLY) finally has calmed down and is playing with the iPad.

6:02 p.m. — I wake up from my half-doze and my partner comes home with more salad fixings (he is on a salad kick right now), and honestly, it all makes me nauseous. I manage to get up and have some bread which helps calm my stomach but when it comes to the salad, I can’t even finish it which NEVER happens.

6:55 p.m. — I feel better from the mini nap I had, but am still shaky so I make a cup of tea, and do all the dishes, and wipe them slowly, breathing in and out to calm my dizzy brain down. Thankfully, Little Bun is being entertained by his father, and I feel a bit better at the end.

7:45 p.m. — Dishes all wiped and put away, I go and lie down, and my partner starts making our lunches for the week by putting all the cooled food into little individual tubs, which causes MORE dishes and the whole sink is full again. I groan inwardly but say nothing. I am not doing this again tonight, I will do them tomorrow night. I am too tired and feeling sick for this.

8:00 p.m. — Little Bun is changed after a bit of protesting (I manage to just lie there with my eyes closed), and then I read to him a few books and a few more pages of “My Room”.

8:47 p.m. — He falls asleep almost immediately, but after my mini nap from the afternoon, I can’t sleep. #%(*#%( This is why I don’t nap no matter how tired I am, I end up screwing up my night time sleep.

Saved: $0

Spent: $4.50