In Week of Money Diary

Week of Money: Where a catfisher threatens to ‘end me’ and find out who I am

DAY ONE

6:30 a.m. — I wake up. Little Bun eagerly asks me: Mommy did I sleep a lot? … I tell him “No“, bluntly. “But that’s okay.” I make a tea.

6:44 a.m. — I start logging my headache that is pounding in my head and where the pain is. I also note how I slept – I woke up a few times with hands behind my head while sleeping which caused my neck and shoulders to ache. I also tried not to sleep on my side and stay on my back but I started to notice my lower back arch in bed which is uncomfortable unless I bend my knees and let my lower back flatten out on the bed. That’s something interesting. Maybe I need a pillow at the end of my bed to elevate my legs when I sleep on my back. Even with my legs bent, it means my thighs are active in some way to stay up, which is not the point of sleeping.

7:19 a.m. — First call of the day. Lots to get done, lots of pressure on this project, things are complicated, our managers are becoming more strained in their talks to us because they’re feeling MAJOR pressure as well.

8:50 a.m. — Back to back meetings until 11.

10:15 a.m. — In between meetings (10-15 minute breaks), I have Little Bun do another Word Adventure, where I test him on Grade 2 spelling, he creates an adventure and he ends up making up a Story about it too, weaving it around the words I made him spell, and then collecting stars at the end to trade in with the words for Diamonds.

11:02 a.m. — Lunch time. I am mentally drained. After meetings, how can you work? But I have so much to get done, I just start powering through. I am working on my second laptop because the first one is far too slow, so I do most of my typing and thinking on my real laptop rather than my work one as it goes much faster without a virtual machine.

12:28 p.m. — I am doing all the dishes and Little Bun unhappily tells me he doesn’t have enough time to wipe all the cutlery AND eat his yoghurt before his nap time. I side eye him and tell him to do as much as he can. He confirms: “And you’ll clean the rest, right?“… I like that he is conscientious in checking that the job will get finished even if it isn’t by him. I also tell him when I see him drifting off / distracted, reminding him: “You said you didn’t have enough time and now you’re wasting it?“… and he quickly hops back to the task and does about half.

1:05 p.m. — Down for his nap, I make a tea. I make more notes about my headache .. and I look outside and see immediately it’s cloudy and about to rain. Predictably I am sick a few hours before (barometric pressure), and it only lets up once the rain is done. I pop pills.

3:22 p.m. — He’s up and is using his iPad to create what he calls “Art without Paper”, and it’s artful photos of his blocks and crayons arranged on the desk.

4:05 p.m. — He shows me his “gallery” that he created on the iPad and named “Art without Paper” because I have been drilling into him to not waste paper or resources, and to see what we can do with what we have got. We only use paper when we really have to, and it is good to think about being careful with what we have got. He’s so creative sometimes.

6:05 p.m. — Little Bun gets fed while watching Octonauts. He’s still enamoured with Paw Patrol so he runs around the home singing the theme song, and when I ask him for help, he WHOOSHES in like a superhero (he even makes the sound effect “WHOOS!H” and then runs off squealing: PAW PATROL!!!!!!!!!

5:56 p.m. — I lie down, tracking my headaches have made me realize that I get sick at the onset of a rainstorm but things like snow are okay because the barometric pressure is different versus rain. It’s snowing now so I feel perfectly fine. I am relieved.

6:47 p.m. — I eat a bowl of pasta and then some yoghurt (adding hemp seeds to them as of late, for extra nutrients) but then feel too full. I am an idiot, I should just pick one or the other. I cannot have both.

7:08 p.m. — Little Bun does schooling with his father.

7:30 p.m. — I feel sick again. I lie down, and try to limit screen time. I find that the less I look at a screen or phone the better I am when I have migraines. This is day ONE of not eating any chocolate the whole day. I have to keep going for the whole month as a test to see if it helps my migraines or not, I may have a sensitivity to cocoa or sugar….

8:12 p.m. — Little Bun does his brushing and teeth.

8:30 p.m. — Time for bed. We were caught up in planning our home, now changing the layout to be slightly different and less with the rooms as bowling alleys.

9:21 p.m. — We read a bedtime book and he chooses the “random order” with his finger going up and down the stories in the book like a lottery wheel ticker.

Spent: $0

DAY TWO

??:?? — I know it’s early. But I don’t feel sick. Little Bun whispers: Mommy the birds are annoying me with their chirping. I whisper back that they have a right to live in the environment and chirp. He asks if he can watch them chirp and I give him permission. He runs out but can’t see them as they’re not on our balcony but in the trees. They’re pretty loud though. Maybe we need to buy binoculars.

6:30 a.m. — I get up with him, he’s clearly not going back to sleep. He eats his yoghurt and I log in to work. Lots of emails this morning, I power through the list.

7:09 a.m. — I make a tea now, I feel sufficiently on top of my workload / future workload to take a mini break.

8:08 a.m. — First meeting of the day.

11:50 a.m. — Meetings done. Wow. There’s a lot. I am working at full speed.

12:05 p.m. — I have a quick lunch and then Little Bun plays games.

1:30 p.m. — More meetings. I thought I’d be done by noon today but some popped up going until 16:00.

3:45 p.m. — Good, it ended early. I actually hate these meetings because you can just message us. Far faster than a meeting where I have to dial in and so on.

4:27 p.m. — Little Bun gets his new book When Sharks Attack with Kindness and he loves it because the comics are easy to read, full-colour and very VERY wholesome. Great for adults and kids alike, I think.

5:40 p.m. — He plays with Daddy while I lie down and rest.

7:28 p.m. — We do all the dishes, cutlery….

8:50 p.m. — Little Bun insists on reading to his Stuffies before bedtime, and even tries to teach them how to read.

To read, you need to look at the word and say what each letter is! Like Little. Lihh..tel!...” I remind him about sounding out the letters and he perks up: “L is luh!.. I is ee… T is tuh.. T is tuh… L is luh.. and E is eh! Put it all together as LITTLE!

8:50 p.m. — Time for bed, a Little Prince Bun story, and he falls asleep beside me.

Spent: $0

DAY THREE

??:?? — I wake up tired again. I am truly getting exhausted from not enough sleep.

6:00 a.m. — Sleep deprived. I make a tea.

9:11 a.m. — We cut out the sheepskin I bought to line my boots (it has worn down), and he tells me: I have an idea!!.. and he grabs a paper, makes me stand on it, draws an outline of my foot and tells me to cut the sheepskin to match it so that it fits perfectly. I tell him it’s a great idea and that’s what we do.

10:30 a.m. — We watch Over the Moon as my headache hits and I need to lie down. I am sleep deprived.

12:56 p.m.Mommy, he warns me, it’s close to my nap time!!. and I shuffle out of his bed after I tell him I will say a story. He says: Okay a quick 4 minute one please… with his eyes on the clock and I make up one about him at the beach learning how to make a sandcastle. The minute it hits 13:00 he tells me: OKAY OUT. Time for my nap. I grab my pillow and head into the second bedroom to la down in his toy house and read.

y1:20 p.m. — I end up falling asleep after my stuffed cookie, which I LOVE. S’more cookie was a good choice.

3:28 p.m. — I wake up so refreshed just as Little Bun wakes up (his knocking and running into the room wakes me up). He tells me: You LOVE napping in my house with babies!.. I basically sleep in his toy house, and the inside is decorated with lots of photos of him as a baby and a toddler at various ages. He tells me: There isn’t a single photo on here that doesn’t have me as a baby. <3.. and I tell him that it is my favourite place to sleep because I wake up to photos of him.

4:07 p.m. — I hunt down new bag straps for my bag, and end up finding some nice looking fabric ones for guitars on Etsy. $58.74

4:22 p.m. — I go to hug him and he tells me: Why didn’t you shower when I was napping!? .. I told him I was trying to be quiet, and he firmly tells me to go shower (I was going to anyway, I told him I would in the morning and he reminded me in his honest Little Boy way)

4:53 p.m. — Shower over, we are in the closet cleaning up and playing. He wants to do his own Little Bun Art, so he does it and then marks it up in Photos.

5:17 p.m. — “Mommy why didn’t you buy a pillow shaped like you when I was a baby so I could cuddle it?“… I tell him that was a good idea but he was a smart baby and likely would have known it wasn’t me, but that was a nice sentiment.

5:51 p.m. — He helps me sort out all of my pills to take for the next 2 weeks. I need his pencil to help me dislodge the vitamins, so he goes and grabs it and warns me: Mommy be careful not to use the writing end!

6:15 p.m. — He asks me: Is your belly growling because you need to eat? Did you rest enough?

6:40 p.m. — We play in the closet and Little Bun creates his own “creations” by taking pictures of things, drawing and writing on them:

8:24 p.m. — After dinner, cleaning up, we go through more movies we could watch together.

Spent: $58.74

DAY FOUR

??:?? — I wake up tired. I need to nap today. I am getting sleep deprived and I think it is PARTLY why I am so sick all the time.

6:15 a.m. — I make a cup of tea, and then log in to try and figure out why my files aren’t transferring.

7:59 a.m. — Daddy is up, so we do some yoga together. Not TOGETHER, but in the same room. He has his own routine, I do what I can (I am slowly getting back into it, and having someone else do it / cue me to do something, is helping greatly).

8:40 a.m. — I tell Little Bun we will have lots of fun today, and we make up activities. He tells me: “If you see an egg painted for Easter, make sure it isn’t an eagle’s egg!” …. I look at him strangely and confirm that I will check for eagle eggs, but I guess it’s from Paw Patrol or something.

8:51 a.m. — We do a Word Adventure..

9:55 a.m. — We read books, then we watch some Octonauts together. He tells me: Mommy, they speak differently! … It’s because they have British accents, and I’ve had people tell me that in the UK, their kids say the same thing but about Paw Patrol which is American.

10:12 a.m. — He creates his own dice out of paper and plays games with us, rolling his die excitedly (he loves that he made them!)

11:40 a.m. — Lunch. I have some pasta, watch Queen Sugar (I saw an episode but felt like I would cry too much especially with that sweet little boy Blue who is about Little Bun’s age), and I stopped watching it, but I will start again. The story is drawing me in, they’re such good actors. The emotions are so raw, and the class, race and so many other distinctions in society are put out on display, which is why it really grips me and hurts my heart in some scenes.

1:33 p.m. — Little Bun down for his nap, I eat another cookie (Skor stuffed cookie) and realize I love it because it has Speculoos in it, one of my favourite spreads that is kind of gingerbread-y and yummy.

3:26 p.m. — I fell asleep and woke up happy, refreshed, and my brain is back.

4:00 p.m. — Little Bun plays with Daddy while I lie down again to read before we do our dinner time & Octonauts.

6:17 p.m. — I do laundry, dishes, wash all the pots, Little Bun runs up to the counter and is eager to wipe down all of the pots because he loves doing it.

6:41 p.m. — The laundry dings, and I get up blearily and he tells me: MOMMY! Don’t worry about it! I’ll get it! .. Best child ever. <3 I have to help him a little anyway, but he thanks me for helping him when he needed it.

6:55 p.m. — I am reading another book and finish it while Little Bun is in the living room playing alone and with his father.

7:20 p.m. — As he’s wiping cutlery he tells me: Mommy I made a family! Mommy, Daddy and Baby.

8:39 p.m. — Time for bed. We do reading time before.

Spent: $0

DAY FIVE

??:?? — Back to work. I wake up early, force myself back to sleep, but with broken sleep I’ll drag today without a nap.

6:19 a.m. — Yawning, I make a tea.

7:04 a.m. — We do yoga early, and then I take a shower.

8:20 a.m. — I log into calls.

8:36 a.m. — OMG people are just choosing violence today. Just got booked for a FOUR TO SIX MEETING TODAY. WHO DOES THIS. *grrrrr*

8:55 a.m. — Little Bun is also choosing violence with me today, getting very upset his leopard isn’t perfect, and I am trying very patiently and calmly to show him how I learned how to draw by looking at outlines, making ovals, then squiggles, and adding details.

10:10 a.m. — Where did the morning go? I have a break before my next call so I take advantage of it.

11:20 a.m. — Finally, page done. His drawings aren’t so bad, but he’s such a perfectionist… it worries me.

11:55 a.m. — He is doing another page of puzzles (you create words out of the letters that are there and the there is a theme) and says mumbling to himself: Mammals.. yes, monkey, ……bear, …….cat… human? Yes. We are mammals, so HUMAN is a word too! *selects it*… it just made me laugh because he was talking to himself the way I do.

12:08 p.m. — Lunch. I scarf down my pizza and then log into my call.

12:28 p.m. — More meetings. Little Bun is still choosing violence today. He’s really grumpy, he’s rejecting all of my patient overtures, I am about to boil over. My partner takes over at this point because my brain is now exhausted.

1:20 p.m. — I paint my toenails.

3:04 p.m. — Little Bun is up. I have meetings so we do a Word Adventure (Halloween theme), and he spells all the words well except Excess & Curious….. I set them aside to retest him on them later.

4:01 p.m. — Little Bun gets the iPad finally while I am on my last calls.

6:00 p.m. — *twitch twitch* I log off.

7:23 p.m. — We check the stalactite formation in our science experiment and it is doing so well:

8:47 p.m. —  We do dishes, laundry, dry and clean up, then time for bed.

Spent: $0

DAY SIX

??:?? — I wake up tired. Really tired. I need a nap.

6:50 a.m. — I make a matcha tea latte.

7:19 a.m. — I log in to work.

8:20 a.m. — Little Bun tells me excitedly about what he’s learning and doing.

8:40 a.m. — I do a bit of yoga.

9:23 a.m. — He creates his own books and I am impressed. He wrote it all ON HIS OWN, spelling on his own, creating the pictures, the story…. I may have a storyteller on my hands.

Here it is, and I will cherish this:

(P.S. – Sigmig is his made up word for Pumpkin because that’s what the book asked him to do in his Workbook today, to create “context” for a word and to know what it meant)

It was Halloween and the sigmigs were not lighting up. I took a look at the lights and found a broken light.

HERE! (See broken light)

But my tape was in my house, all I had was a map.

See map.

I looked inside and found no tape. I changed my plans. I took my shovel and dug.

I found my tape and fixed the light, and the sigmigs were glowing again.

The End. Try it out: Easter Hunt, Book 2

Dictionary of the word: Sigmig

Story Number 3

Next: Story-Story Number 2.

Stuffie Language to English

Sigmig = Pumpkin in Canadian English

Veggie and Halloween Decor (there’s a Pacman saying DELICIOUS and eating a pumpkin)

Pumpkin pics (he learned pics = Pictures)

The End

Find its pal, Story Number One (he means the Sigmig story)

12:12 p.m. — Time for lunch.

1:01 p.m. — Down for his nap. I am back to work.

2:22 p.m. — I take a break and paint my toenails a new magenta colour. The old red was chipped.

2:56 p.m. — We do the Easter Egg Hunt with the coloured eggs, basket and so on:

3:57 p.m. — We do a cute little Stuffie Easter Egg icon:

3:34 p.m. — Log off. Early this time.

5:25 p.m. — Dinner, I do dishes, laundry…

7:46 p.m. — We read books to the Stuffies.

Stuffie becomes a butterfly!

8:23 p.m. — My partner tells me he added a pillow to help me sleep on my side, so my shoulder doesn’t crunch down hard and hurt. <3…. The pillow is high and comfortable for my neck and head.

Spent: $0

DAY SEVEN

6:30 a.m. — I wake up and make a big cup of matcha to survive.

8:08 a.m. — I log in to start meetings.

11:24 a.m. — He adds to his Stuffie Manual and tells me he created an algebra equation where PAGE Y has to be solved..

Y = X and 3-2 = X … Ergo, Page Y = 1!

12:08 p.m. — I tell him: After your nap, let’s do a fun game of words okay? … He tells me: SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN! … I don’t even know where he learned that.

1:28 p.m. — I make a cup of tea. I’m getting a bollocking from a manager this week, he’s on my back because he thinks we aren’t doing things a certain way that he had envisioned, but things change and I am tired. I only just started on this project, and it’s like they expect me to know everything that they’ve been doing for years, in a few months.

1:47 p.m. — Not accepting this nonsense. Don’t shame me for my choices. I have nothing to be shamed for.

3:04 p.m. — After his nap, he’s up.

4:08 p.m. — I log off. I read my books, and then I watch some Queen Sugar. I LOVE THIS SHOW SO MUCH. I cannot express how deep and raw this show makes me feel, and I cry at almost every episode. It’s terrible how good it is, and it is incredible…. So many topics covered and such a deep, raw look into being black in the South and what surrounds being black.

The little boy Blue reminds me SO MUCH of Little Bun. Goodness he’s adorable. I want to hug him and I fully recognize how creepy that sounds as a stranger, but I want to hug how this little boy makes me feel.

5:08 p.m. — I do dishes while watching it.

5:37 p.m. — I go to snuggle him and he asks me worriedly: Mommy, wait! Are your toenails dry!?… He knows I just painted them the yesterday and he wants to be sure I won’t smudge them. I tell him I am good, I snuggle him and then thank him for checking it was okay.

6:25 p.m. — He creates a new piece of art, and pasted the sign on the ketchup bottle:

6:48 p.m. — I like these two looks a lot. A long skirt, oversized belt, and such a great combo…

 

And this sweater! I love the turtleneck and the long slit.

7:13 p.m. — I recently received a pretty deranged direct message from someone.

Click to read it with caution, it’s full of expletives, and rather abusive language:

Then this catfisher (I suspect it is a man based on the language cues and words used), posts this:

If it wasn’t so sad, I’d be laughing. Honestly. But this is just a small example of the kind of abuse people put up with online when they put themselves out there. Even anonymously, like me.

This is why I will never ever post anything or say anything because there are too many psychos out there. Even buying and selling on Kijiji is a risk because people are PSYCHOS.

What if they knew who I was? Came after my family? My son? This kind of cowardice hiding behind a screen is despicable.

Also, what do they plan to do even if they do find out who I am? Tell my employer? And then what? Have them say: “So you’re rich? Congrats. Get back to work.” I don’t even understand what the end game is here, and why people are so malicious that they expend this kind of negative energy when they could just stop reading/following and move on with their lives, directing that energy to somewhere that brings them something better.

7:20 p.m. — I do laundry, and then take a shower.

8:49 p.m. — Time for bed. We start getting ready.

Spent: $0

———-

Want more? Read all of my previous Week of Money Diaries.

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Sherry of Save. Spend. Splurge.

Am my own Sugar Daddy. Am a millionaire at 36 after getting out of $60K of student debt in 18 months, a little over a decade earlier, using TheBudgetingTool.com. I have worked 50% of my career (taking 1-2 year breaks), and quadrupled my income within 2 years of graduating, going from $65K to $260K with an average lifetime savings rate of 50%. I have 11 side incomes that are on track in 2020 to make me $50K - $75K. I could retire today if I wanted, but love my work-life balance as a freelancing consultant in STEM (Science, Technology, Engineering, Math). I am all about balance - between time and money, and also enjoying my money. I also post daily on Instagram @saverspender.

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6 Comments

  1. steveark

    It is hard to figure why you’d elicit that kind of anger. You are not offensive even to a fairly rural hick like me. You have a logical basis for your opinions and you don’t insult people for fun. I’d guess its the celebrity thing, or it might be the all too common male bias against strong, independent, successful women. Personally I find your opinions stretch my thinking and that’s very good for me. Boomers are full of stereotypes and were raised in a time when all manner of offensive thought was tolerated and even encouraged. We need some re-education in many areas. Well, hate that you have haters but I think it goes with being a high profile winner, plus I know you don’t draw your approval from others, especially trolls.

    Reply
    1. Sherry of Save. Spend. Splurge.

      It’s because I am someone they can’t imagine having succeeded and somehow my success has taken away from theirs when there is enough to go around for everyone to share.

      I appreciate you saying that you’re learning from me! That’s exciting because I am teaching myself new things as well, in light of all that has happened in the past few years. Never too old to learn.

      Reply
  2. Paula Geisik

    I really enjoy your writing, however, your website reloads so many times, that I have to start over five or six times to read the whole column. Can you slow down the Google ads or something?

    Reply
    1. Sherry of Save. Spend. Splurge.

      I’ve already set the Google load down as low as it can go. It’s like it’s not listening to me … I have to spend time on this sometime this weekend.

      Reply
  3. Maria

    wow, seriously unbalanced, “miss janna evan” sounds like an anagram.. maybe of vanessa or jasmin, but the language sounds male…

    Reply

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