In Link Love

In the world of Save. Spend. Splurge.: It’s not in your head, he’s using weaponized incompetence

1. Weaponized incompetence

This. Everything about this article… it’s … such a good read. Here’s an except to whet your appetite:

Rodsky went on to say that advice for women to “‘lower their standards’ or ‘stop doing unnecessary things’ is not only infuriating but it is dangerous.” She cites a friend’s story as an example of this danger: “My friend is married to a chef and found a paring knife in her kid’s carseat WTF!” As Rodsky’s friend said of the incident, “I am not lowering my standards. There was a knife in my kid’s fucking car seat.”

…and this

According to Laura: “Being on dish duty and letting it get so bad that the dinner-duty partner doesn’t have what they need to cook? Weaponized incompetence. But graham crackers, carrots and peanut butter for weekend lunch? Sending the kid to daycare in mismatched clothes? You need to come to a compromise.” 

I wholeheartedly agree. Some things, you have to let it go. Other things, you need to speak up and be angry about it or else things will not change. I have had a number of DMs from people who have told me that they realized their partner was treating them unfairly, and once they confronted them, there was a blowup, but then he realized he had to step up or get out.

2. Wonderland

I find these Alice in Wonderland mugs totally adorable. They come in various characters like Alice, The Rabbit, etc. You could have characters for each family member!

3. NFTs

This 12-year old, is set to make $400K in 2 months from selling NFTs. Kids are truly wild these days. I don’t even understand what they really are, except that they’re virtual pieces you can hold and own? He coded and sold these whales through blockchain and it took off. Pretty cool, and cute. I mean, when I was 12, I was delivering newspapers. I certainly wasn’t doing things like creating NFTs or anything of this sort.

Kids can be so ingenious and creative – though I will mention that this comes from a place of privilege as his father is in IT, so that naturally segued into what he learned and did. That’s not to take away from what he accomplished, but it makes me wonder how many other kids out there with the right environments would have done the same if they could.

4. Organic

I discovered artisan Eva Remenyi, with her beautiful organic rings, necklaces and bracelets. I can definitely replicate a few of them in clay on my own, but the others, I am eying to purchase such as this twisted nautical knot ring or this super delicate gold leaf on a ring. There is something quite soothing about organic jewellery that looks like tree bark and the like.

5. Scrubbed out

A woman wearing scrubs is not assumed to be the doctor, but to be the nurse instead. This is not uncommon. A recent study in the Journal of the American Medical Association revealed that patients were about 20 percent less likely to assume that a woman wearing scrubs was a surgeon, compared with men. The study also found that patients consider a woman in scrubs to be “less professional” than a man in the same outfit.

This is also not uncommon to just the medical profession. Women across all industries have to dress extra professional to be taken seriously, and even so, there were studies of how many people just assume the guy in any group of women, is the leader. It’s frustrating. As a woman you have to dress more professionally, and be twice as good just to be taken as seriously as a mediocre man, not to mention the pink tax of “professional” including makeup to be worn, nails done, hair to be styled, dyed and done, great skin with no wrinkles or acne, spots, even things like pantyhose – none of which men are subject to in terms of scrutiny.

You can say as a woman: I refuse to participate in this patriarchal set of beauty standards… but it clearly hurts your chances and do you want to be the martyr for this cause? I know female flight attendants are REQUIRED to wear makeup, pantyhose, etc, and it all comes out of their own pocket, whereas men do not have the same guidelines of what is considered “professional”.

Watch: How two flight attendants spend their $48K incomes

6. Cuffed

Quite a well-priced, adorable brass cuff from Banana Republic. I like having a bunch of these stacked up on my arms, and if they keep making simple, organic-style jewellery, they could do quite well. I actually enjoy the entire BR line this season, they took on an aviator theme and it is just fantastic, like this statement balloon sleeve sweater.

7. Uprising

Cher Scarlett had a rough start, but eventually taught herself to code and is now an elite programmer at Apple… who is leading an uprising there. But she isn’t the only one speaking out: “This is an industry with a pronounced racism and misogyny problem” I am glad something is finally being said, and people are speaking up. How far this will go, who knows? But everything begins with a small step.

8. Animalia

I am really not into animal prints, but this heart-printed, calf hair belt from Ann Taylor has some animal print vibes that look fun. I use belts all the time to change my look because it helps cinch in waists, lends interest to an outfit and a little colour without being too much.

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In the world of Save. Spend. Splurge.

Posted on March 21, 2015

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